Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2022/Needle fear

Heading casing

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Hi U3166273. FYI, the recommended Wikiversity heading style uses sentence casing. For example:

Self-determination theory rather than Self-Determination Theory

Here's an example chapter with correct heading casing: Growth mindset development

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 01:20, 27 August 2022 (UTC)Reply

Heading casing

edit
 
FYI, the recommended Wikiversity heading style uses sentence casing. For example:

Self-determination theory rather than Self-Determination Theory

Here's an example chapter with correct heading casing: Growth mindset development

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 22:15, 7 October 2022 (UTC)Reply

Children needle fear

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Very interesting topic! I work in a medical centre and always see children with needle phobias attending the practice. One thing I have learnt through observation/the nurses telling stories is that most needle phobias from kids comes from the parent being overly worried - the fear must come from somewhere! It would be interesting to see how parents who are not scared of needles pass this fear down to their children. At our centre we offer these families the choice to call when they are in the carpark and the nurse will get them when she is ready, I personally find this making the situation more serious/dramatic/scary so I wonder if there is any research behind this too. --GeorgiaFairweather (discusscontribs) 11:28, 10 October 2022 (UTC)Reply


Topic development feedback

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The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to see editing changes made whilst reviewing this chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments below may also be about all material on the page at the time of providing this feedback.

 
  1. The title and sub-title are incorrect. Be consistent with the book table of contents.
  1. Good
  2. Brief description about self provided – consider expanding
  3. Very brief description about self provided – consider expanding
  4. Consider linking to your eportfolio page and/or any other professional online profile or resume such as LinkedIn. This is not required, but it can be useful to interlink your professional networks.
  5. Link provided to book chapter
  1. At least one contribution has been made and summarised with indirect link(s) to evidence
  2. Add direct links to evidence. To do this: View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click "compare selected revisions", and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see Making and summarising social contributions.
  1. See earlier comment about Heading casing
  2. Well-developed, mostly 2-level heading structure
  3. Effective use of questions as the top-level headings
  4. The original sub-title offers a pretty clear top-level structure (it contains three questions) which partly matches the proposed heading structure.
  1. Promising, partial development of key points for each section, with limited use of relevant citations
  2. For sections which include sub-sections include key points for an overview paragraph prior to branching into the sub-headings
  3. Overview - Consider adding:
    1. focus questions
    2. an image
    3. an example or case study
  4. Strive for an integrated balance of theory and research
  5. Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to other relevant book chapters
  6. Consider including more examples/case studies
  7. Conclusion (the most important section):
    1. Under developed
  8. Generally well-written, but I recommend using the Studiosity service and/or a service like Grammarly to help improve the quality of written expression because there are a lot of grammatical and spelling errors.
  1. A relevant figure is presented
  2. Caption could better explain how the image connects to key points being made in the main text
  3. Cite each figure at least once in the main text
  1. Move non-peer-reviewed sources to External links
  2. Not all references have been cited
  3. For APA referencing style, check and correct:
    1. capitalisation
    2. make doi hyperlinks active (i.e., clickable)
  1. See also
  2. External links
    1. Excellent

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 22:15, 7 October 2022 (UTC)Reply

Book chapter review and feedback

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This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Chapter marks will be available via UCLearn along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

 

Overall

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  1. Overall, this is an excellent chapter that successfully uses psychological theory and research to help address a practical, real-world phenomenon or problem'
  2. The sub-title has been corrected to match the index of topics
  3. For additional feedback, see the following comments and these copyedits
  1. Well developed Overview
  2. Clearly explains the problem or phenomenon
  3. Engages reader interest by introducing a case study and/or example and/or using an image
  4. Clear/Basic focus question(s)
  5. The focus questions could be improved by being more specific to the topic (i.e., the sub-title)
  6. Ideally, provide open-ended, rather than closed-ended focus questions
  7. Add focus questions in a feature box to help guide the reader and structure the chapter
  1. An excellent range of relevant theories are selected, described, and explained
  2. Build more strongly on other fear-related chapters (e.g., by embedding links to other chapters in this category: Category:Motivation and emotion/Book/Fear)
  1. Insightful depth is provided about relevant theory(ies)
  2. Key citations are well used
  1. Excellent review of relevant research
  1. Very good critical thinking about relevant research is evident
  2. Claims are mostly referenced
  1. Excellent integration between theory and research
  1. Excellent summary and conclusion
  2. Key points are well summarised
  3. Provides practical, take-home message(s)
  1. Written expression
    1. Overall, the quality of written expression is very good
    2. Use 3rd person perspective (e.g., "it") rather than 1st (e.g., "we") or 2nd person (e.g., "you") perspective[1] in the main text, although 1st or 2nd person perspective can work well for case studies or feature boxes.
    3. "People" is often a better term than "individuals"
  2. Grammar
    1. The grammar for some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags)
      1. Grammar-checking tools are available in most internet browsers and word processing software packages.[2]
      2. Another option is to share draft work with peers and ask for their assistance.
    2. Check and make correct use of commas
    3. Use serial commas[3] – they are part of APA style and are generally recommended by grammaticists. See explanatory video (1 min)
    4. Abbreviations
      1. Once an abbreviation is established (e.g., CBT), use it consistently. Don't set up an abbreviation and then not use it or only use it sometimes.
  3. Spelling
    1. Use Australian spelling (e.g., hypothesize vs. hypothesise; behavior vs. behaviour)
  4. APA style
    1. Use double (not single) quotation marks "to introduce a word or phrase used as an ironic comment, as slang, or as an invented or coined expression; use quotation marks only for the first occurrence of the word or phrase, not for subsequent occurrences" (APA 7th ed., 2020, p. 159)
    2. Figures
      1. Figures are very well captioned
      2. Each Figure is referred to at least once within the main text
    3. Citations use correct APA style
    4. References are not in full APA style. For example:
      1. Check and correct use of italicisation
  1. Excellent use of learning features
  2. Excellent use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles
  3. No use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Embedding in-text links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project.
  4. Excellent use of image(s)
  5. No use of table(s)
  6. Excellent use of feature box(es)
  7. Excellent use of quiz(zes)
  8. Excellent use of case studies or examples
  9. Very good use of interwiki links in the "See also" section
    1. Also include links to related Wikipedia articles
  10. Excellent use of external links in the "External links" section
  1. ~8 logged, useful, minor/moderate/major social contributions with direct links to evidence
  2. Use a numbered list per Tutorial 02

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 02:43, 20 November 2022 (UTC)Reply

Multimedia presentation feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

 

Overall

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  1. Overall, this is a very good presentation
  1. An opening slide with the title and sub-title is displayed. The sub-title is narrated. Also narrate the title — this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation
  2. Consider creating an engaging introduction to hook audience interest
  3. Establish a context for the topic (e.g., by using an example or explaining why it is important), to help the viewer understand
  4. Consider asking focus questions that lead to take-away messages. This will help to focus and discipline the presentation.
  1. Comments about the book chapter may also apply to this section
  2. The presentation addresses the topic
  3. An appropriate amount of content is presented — not too much or too little
  4. The presentation is well structured (i.e., Overview, Content, Conclusion)
  5. The presentation makes very good use of relevant psychological theory
  6. The presentation makes very good use of relevant psychological research
  7. Include citations to support claims
  8. The presentation makes very good use of one or more examples or case studies or practical advice
  9. The presentation provides practical, easy to understand information
  1. A Conclusion slide is presented with very good take-home message(s)
  1. The presentation makes basic use of narrated audio
  2. Audio communication is reasonably well paced
  3. The audio is hard to follow because of the pronunciation/accent. Consider improving articulation to enhance the clarity of speech.
  1. Overall, visual display quality is excellent
  2. The presentation makes effective use of text and image based slides
  3. The font size is sufficiently large to make it easy to read
  4. The amount of text presented per slide makes it easy to read and listen at the same time
  5. The visual communication is effectively supplemented by images and/or diagrams
  6. The presentation is very well produced
  1. The chapter title and sub-title (or an abbreviation to fit within the 100 character limit) are used in the name of the presentation — this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. Check and correct the sub-title capitalisation.
  2. A written description of the presentation is provided
  3. Excellent use of time codes
  4. A link to the book chapter is provided but it goes to a specific section rather than the top of the chapter
  5. A link from the book chapter is provided
  6. The presentation is incorrectly categorised as being for kids. This introduces limitations, such as being unable to add the presentation to a playlist. More info.
  1. Image sources and their copyright status are not provided.
  2. A copyright license for the presentation is provided

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 09:26, 22 November 2022 (UTC)Reply

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