Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2021/Approach motivation

Topic development feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title The title is correctly worded and formatted The sub-title contained some useful ideas, even though it differed from the book table of contents, so I've edited it on both pages to be consistent User page Created - minimal, but sufficient Description about self provided Link to resume gives me: "403. That’s an error. We're sorry, but you do not have access to this page. That’s all we know." Link provided to book chapter Social contribution None summarised with link(s) to evidence Social contributions for this unit are useful contributions to other Wikiversity book chapters and/or discussion via UCLearn and/or Twitter #emot21 Headings Promising 3-level heading structure Could benefit from further development by either expanding the 3rd level of the structure or simplifying to a 2-level structure Avoid having sections with 1 sub-heading - use 0 or 2+ sub-headings Key points Key points are well developed for each section, with relevant citations Overview - Consider adding: focus questions an image an example or case study Citations are not in APA style (e.g., APA style does not include author initials) Some links are broken (e.g., Maslow inherency of needs - there is no such thing). Try hierarchy of needs. Strive for an integrated balance of theory and research Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to other relevant book chapters. Consider including more examples/case studies Conclusion (the most important section): well developed in a nutshell, what are the answer(s) to the question(s) in the sub-title and/or focus questions? This is generally well-written, but I recommend using the Studiosity service to help improve the quality of written expression because there are a lot of grammar and spelling errors. Figure Very good A figure is presented Check order Caption should include Figure X. ... (note italics) Caption could better explain how the image connects to key points being made in the main text Consider increasing image sizes to make them easier to view References Good For APA referencing style, check and correct: alphabetical order capitalisation italicisation some dois missing Resources See also Excellent External links These links are added correctly, but have nothing to do with approach motivation!?

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 03:07, 18 September 2021 (UTC)

Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Chapter marks will be available via UCLearn along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall Overall, this is an insufficient chapter. The main areas for potential improvement are: Quality of written expression Focus and understanding of theory Review of research Use of examples and learning features For additional feedback, see the following comments and these copyedits. Overview The Overview is underdeveloped. The Overview could be improved by providing a clearer description of the problem or phenomenon. Consider developing focus questions (rather than learning outcomes) to help guide the reader and structure the chapter. Consider introducing a case study or example or using an image to help engage reader interest. Theory — Breadth Insufficient coverage and synthesis of theory. A mish-mash of theory is used, but there is a lack of coherent synthesis and focused application to the question: "What is approach motivation and how does it lead to behaviour?". The behaviour approach system is not discussed. Theory — Depth Insufficient depth of coverage of relevant psychological theory. More examples could be useful to illustrate key concepts. Research — Key findings Insufficient use of relevant psychological research. Research — Critical thinking Insufficient critical thinking about research is evident. Critical thinking about research could be further evidenced by: describing the methodology (e.g., sample, measures) in important studies discussing the direction of relationships considering the strength of relationships acknowledging limitations suggesting specific directions for future research Integration Insufficient integration of theory and research. Conclusion Basic summary. Add practical, take-home message(s) for each focus question. Written expression — Style Written expression Overall, the quality of written expression is below professional standard. UC Study Skills assistance is recommended to help improve writing skills. I started indicating the grammatical and spelling errors but there were so many, I stopped. Major overhaul and assistance needed to produce of a satisfactory university standard. Use 3rd person perspective (e.g., "it") rather than 1st (e.g., "we") or 2nd person (e.g., "you") perspective[1] in the main text, although 1st or 2nd person perspective can work well for case studies or feature boxes. Layout Sections which branch into sub-sections should include an introductory paragraph before branching into the sub-sections. Grammar The grammar for almost all sentences is incorrect (e.g., see the tags). Grammar-checking tools are available in most internet browsers and word processing software packages. Another option is to share draft work with peers and ask for their assistance. I strongly recommend major intervention (e.g., writing classes, tutoring etc.). Use serial commas[2] - they are part of APA style and are generally recommended by grammaticists. Here's an explanatory video (1 min). Abbreviations Abbreviations (such as e.g., i.e.., etc.) should only be used inside parentheses. Spelling Spelling is very poor (e.g., see the tags). Spell-checking tools are available in most internet browsers and word processing software packages. Proofreading More proofreading is needed to fix typos and bring the quality of written expression closer to a professional standard. APA style Figures and tables Figures are not in sequence. Figures lack sufficient integration with main text. Refer to each Table and Figure using APA style (e.g., do not use italics, check and correct capitalisation). References are not in full APA style. For example: Check and correct use of capitalisation[3] Check and correct use of italicisation Page numbers should be separated by an en-dash (–) rather than a hyphen (-) Include hyperlinked dois Move non-peer-reviewed sources to the external links section Written expression — Learning features Overall, the use of learning features is basic. Basic use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. No use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Embedding in-text links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project. Basic use of image(s). No use of table(s). Good use of feature box(es). Basic use of quiz(zes). No use of case studies or examples. Social contribution ~4 logged, mostly last minute, minor social contributions without direct links to evidence, so unable to easily verify and assess. Unable to view tweet: "You’re unable to view this Tweet because this account owner limits who can view their Tweets."

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall Overall, this is an excellent/very good/reasonably good/basic presentation. Overall, this is an insufficient presentation. Overall, this is an insufficient presentation mainly because it presents too much content visually and auditorily. The presentation is under the maximum time limit. The presentation is over the maximum time limit - content beyond 3 mins is ignored for marking and feedback purposes. Overview An opening slide does not show the correct title and sub-title - this would help to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. Consider asking focus questions that lead to take-away messages. Content Comments about the book chapter also apply to this section. This presentation doesn't adequately address the topic. An appropriate amount of content is presented - not too much or too little. The selection of content is poor because it doesn't adequately use the most relevant psychological theory and/or research to address the topic. The presentation makes lacks use of of the most relevant psychological theory (e.g., behavioural inhibition vs. behavioural approach system). The presentation makes no use of relevant psychological research. The presentation could be improved by making more use of examples or case studies. Conclusion The Conclusion is vague and it is not clear how the take-home message relates to the original topic. Audio The audio is easy to follow. Audio communication is clear and well paced. The audio communication is sometimes hesitant - could benefit from further practice. Audio recording quality was excellent. Video Overall, visual display quality is basic. The presentation makes basic use of text and image based slides. Check and correct spelling errors. The font size should be larger to make it easier to read. The visual communication could be improved by including some relevant images. The presentation is basically produced using simple tools. Hide presentation tools. Meta-data The correct chapter title and sub-title are not used for the name of the presentation - this would help to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. A brief written description of the presentation is provided. Consider expanding. A link to the book chapter is provided but it goes to a specific section rather than the top of the chapter. A link from the book chapter is provided. Licensing Image sources and their copyright status are not provided. Either provide details about the image sources and their copyright licenses in the presentation description or remove the presentation. A copyright license for the presentation is provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 09:04, 15 November 2021 (UTC)