Latest comment: 1 year ago1 comment1 person in discussion
Hi, would possibly talking about the athletes mindset prior to injury compared to after help with depth for athlete background. Also would definitely look at career ending injuries of athletes and how this changed their lifestyle choices. For example, turning to substance abuse. --Zmelmoth02 (discuss • contribs) 14:47, 24 August 2023 (UTC)Reply
Latest comment: 1 year ago1 comment1 person in discussion
The topic development submission has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history for editing changes made whilst reviewing this chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date.
Consider linking to your eportfolio page and/or any other professional online profile or resume such as LinkedIn. This is not required, but it can be useful to interlink your professional networks.
Right idea, but provide a numbered list and DIRECT link to evidence for each contribution
To do this: View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click "compare selected revisions", and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see Making and summarising social contributions.
Latest comment: 1 year ago1 comment1 person in discussion
This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Chapter marks will be available via UCLearn along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.
Overall, this is a reasonably good chapter. It makes good use of psychological theory and basic use of research to address a real-world phenomenon or problem.
For additional feedback, see the following comments and these copyedits
Overall, the quality of written expression is basic
Avoid starting sentences with a citation unless the author is particularly pertinent. Instead, it is more interesting for the the content/key point to be communicated, with the citation included along the way or, more typically, in parentheses at the end of the sentence.
Embed direct quotes within sentences and paragraphs, rather than presenting them holus-bolus. Even better, communicate the concept in your own words.
"People" is often a better term than "individuals"
The chapter could be improved by developing some of the bullet points into full paragraph format
Avoid one sentence paragraphs. Convey one idea per paragraph using three to five sentences.
Use 3rd person perspective (e.g., "it") rather than 1st (e.g., "we") or 2nd person (e.g., "you") perspective[1] in the main text, although 1st or 2nd person perspective can work well for case studies or feature boxes
Avoid overly emotive language (e.g,. shatters) in science-based communication
Layout
The chapter is well structured, with major sections using sub-sections
Grammar
The grammar for some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags)
Use double (not single) quotation marks "to introduce a word or phrase used as an ironic comment, as slang, or as an invented or coined expression" (APA 7th ed., 2020, p. 159)
"Use quotation marks only for the first occurrence of the word or phrase, not for subsequent occurrences" (APA 7th ed., 2020, p. 159)
Write numbers under 10 using words (e.g., five). Express numbers 10 and over using numerals (e.g., 10).
Direct quotes need page numbers – even better, write in your own words
Replace double spaces with single spaces
Figures
Figures are well captioned
Each Figure is referred to at least once within the main text
Citations are not in full APA style (7th ed.). For example:
If there are three or more authors, cite the first author followed by et al., then year. For example, either:
in-text, Smith et al. (2020), or
in parentheses (Smith et al., 2020)
Use ampersand (&) inside parentheses and "and" outside parentheses
References are not in full APA style. For example:
Basic use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. Adding more interwiki links for the first mention of key words and technical concepts would make the text even more interactive. See example.
One use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Embedding in-text links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project.
Very good use of image(s)
No use of table(s)
Good use of feature box(es)
Good use of quiz(zes) and/or reflection question(s)
Good use of case studies or examples
Good use of interwiki links in the "See also" section
Include sources in parentheses
Move external links to the external link section
Good use of external links in the "External links" section
Latest comment: 1 year ago1 comment1 person in discussion
The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.
This presentation could be improved by displaying and narrating a slide with the same title and sub-title as the book chapter to help the viewer understand the purpose of the presentation
A context for the presentation is clearly established
The audience is global. Australia represents ~0.3% of world population. So, the opening example is not as compelling as it could be if international statistics were used.
Consider asking focus questions that lead to take-away messages. This will help to focus and discipline the presentation.
The presentation makes reasonably good use of narrated audio
Consider slowing down and leaving longer pauses between sentences. This can help the viewer to cognitively digest the information that has just been presented before moving on to the next point.
Consider using greater intonation to enhance listener interest and engagement
The narration is reasonably well practiced and/or performed
Audio recording quality was excellent
The narrated content is well matched to the target topic (see content)
The chapter title is used, but the sub-title (or a shortened version of it) is not used, as the name of the presentation. The sub-title (or an abbreviation of the sub-title that fits within the 100 character limit) would help to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
Provide an informative description to help viewers decide whether they want to watch