Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2021/Amotivational syndrome

Feedback

Had a look through your book chapter structure and I thought your headings were good. I found an article that you might find interesting in regards to your focus question on marijuana use and its relation to amotivational syndrome: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5732901/ The article is called Testing the Amotivational Syndrome: Marijuana Use Longitudinally Predicts Lower Self-Efficacy Even After Controlling for Demographics, Personality, and Alcohol and Cigarette Use. Cheers. - --Mokkamicci (discuss • contribs) 14:49, 29 August 2021 (UTC)

Heading casing

FYI, the recommended Wikiversity heading style uses sentence casing. For example: Self-determination theory rather than Self-Determination Theory Here's an example chapter with correct heading casing: Growth mindset development -- Jtneill - Talk - c 22:49, 12 September 2021 (UTC)

Topic development feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title The title is correctly worded Capitalisation of the title has been corrected to be consistent with the book table of contents The sub-title is correctly worded and formatted User page Excellent - used effectively Description about self provided, with link(s) to professional profile(s) Link provided to book chapter Social contribution Summarised with indirect link(s) to evidence Add direct links to evidence. To do this: View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click "compare selected revisions", and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see Making and summarising social contributions. Add your signature to comments on talk/discussion pages Headings Basic, 1-level heading structure. Headings are logical, but the chapter headings could benefit from further development, perhaps using a 2-level structure See earlier comment about Heading casing Key points Avoid overcapitalisation (APA style) - more info Overview - Consider: providing a description of the problem and what will be covered an image an example or case study the 4th focus question isn't really needed - or if it is to be kept, also include SSRI-related AM as a focus question Basic development of key points for each section There are insufficient citations Strive to represent the best available psychological theory and research on this topic. Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to other relevant book chapters. This is particularly important for this chapter as there are several other chapters about closely related concepts. Conclusion (the most important section): hasn't been developed what might the take-home, practical messages be? in a nutshell, what are the answer(s) to the question(s) in the sub-title? Figure A figure is not presented References None Remember that the goal is to identify and use the best academic theory and research about this topic. Resources See also Use internal linking style for Wikipedia links (see examples already included plus changes made to your user page) Include source in brackets after link Also link to relevant book chapters External links None provided

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 22:49, 12 September 2021 (UTC)

Article

Interesting topic you have chosen! I look forward to reading more as you develop this book chapter. I found an article that you might interesting. It is related to what brain regions are effected in Amotivational syndrome: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0028393217302506 The article is called The anatomy of apathy: A neurocognitive framework for amotivated behaviour Keep up the good work! --U3202023 (discuss • contribs) 07:05, 5 October 2021 (UTC)

Suggestion

Hey, was reading up about this topic, very interesting topic. I was particularly interested in drug use with this syndrome. Here is some interesting reading that might be of help https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s11121-017-0811-3 --U3202984 (discuss • contribs) 11:14, 15 October 2021 (UTC)

Suggestion

Hi, your chapter is really good. Moreover, that would be great if you double-check the APA formatting for the reference list.--U3195440 (discuss • contribs) 21:22, 17 October 2021 (UTC)

Added figure

Hi! I've just added a figure and linking caption from the Barnwell study which backs up one of the data points you reference in text. --U3204330 (discuss • contribs) 13:48, 30 October 2021 (UTC)

Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Chapter marks will be available via UCLearn along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall Overall, this is an interesting chapter that successfully described amotivational syndrome, drawing on neuroscience theory and research, and providing a useful, insightful description. The main area for potential improvement is the quality of written expression, which is below professional standard. Addressing the topic development feedback could have helped to improve this chapter. For additional feedback, see the following comments and these copyedits. Overview Useful Overview. Consider: Adding a case study or example to help engage reader interest. Developing focus questions to help guide the reader and structure the chapter. Theory — Breadth Relevant theories are well selected and explained. A good understanding is evident. Some of the neuroscience is quite complex - more embedded links for the key concepts would be helpful. The chapter doesn't wander off into discussion of irrelevant theory. Theory — Depth Appropriate depth is provided about the selected theory(ies). Key citations are well used. Tables and/or lists could be used to help clearly convey key theoretical information. More examples could be useful to illustrate key concepts. Research — Key findings Relevant research is cited and reviewed. Greater emphasis on major reviews and/or meta-analyses would be helpful. Research — Critical thinking Critical thinking about research is very good. Integration Discussion of theory and research is well integrated. Conclusion The Conclusion provides a good, but somewhat longish summary. Consider: Reminding the reader about the problem or phenomenon of interest. Summarising the key points. Adding practical, take-home messages. Written expression — Style Written expression Overall, the quality of written expression is promising, but below professional standard. UC Study Skills assistance is recommended to help improve writing skills. Reduce use of weasel words (e.g., "It is also discussed that") which bulk out the text, but don't enhance meaning. Use active rather than passive voice[1][2]. Layout The chapter is well structured, with major sections using sub-sections. Sections which branch into sub-sections should include an introductory paragraph before branching into the sub-sections. Headings should use default wiki style (e.g., remove additional bold). Grammar The grammar for many sentences could be improved (e.g., see the tags). Grammar-checking tools are available in most internet browsers and word processing software packages. Another option is to share draft work with peers and ask for their assistance. Check and correct use of that vs. who. Check and correct use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's vs individuals').[3]. Use serial commas[4] - they are part of APA style and are generally recommended by grammaticists. Here's an explanatory video (1 min). Spelling Use Australian spelling (e.g., hypothesize vs. hypothesise; behavior vs. behaviour). APA style Use double (not single) quotation marks "to introduce a word or phrase used as an ironic comment, as slang, or as an invented or coined expression; use quotation marks only for the first occurrence of the word or phrase, not for subsequent occurrences" (APA 7th ed., 2020, p. 159). References use correct APA style. Written expression — Learning features Overall, the use of learning features is good. Excellent use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. No use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Embedding in-text links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project. Good use of image(s). No use of table(s). No use of feature box(es). Basic use of quiz(zes). No use of case studies or examples. Social contribution ~5 logged social contributions without direct links to evidence, so unable to easily verify and assess.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 03:06, 3 November 2021 (UTC)

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall Overall, this is a basic presentation. The presentation is over the maximum time limit - content beyond 3 mins is ignored for marking and feedback purposes. Overview The sub-title is missing on the opening slide - this would help to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. Very brief. Briefly explain why this topic is important. Consider asking focus questions that lead to take-away messages. Content Comments about the book chapter may also apply to this section. Explain the topic for a general audience (e.g., what are SSRIs?) The presentation addresses the topic. An appropriate amount of content is presented - not too much or too little. The presentation makes good use of relevant psychological theory. The presentation makes good use of relevant psychological research. The presentation makes basic use of one or more examples or case studies or practical advice. Conclusion The presentation could be strengthened by adding a Conclusion slide with practical, take-home messages. Audio The audio is interesting to listen to. The presentation makes good use of narrated audio. Audio communication is reasonably well paced. If anything, slow down a little to help the listener cognitively digest the information. Very good intonation enhances listener interest and engagement. Audio recording quality was very good. Video Overall, visual display quality is basic. The presentation makes basic use of text-based slides. The font size is sufficiently large to make it easy to read. The amount of text presented per slide should be reduced to make it easier to read and listen at the same time. The visual communication could be improved by including some relevant images or diagrams. Meta-data The chapter title but not the sub-title is used in the name of the presentation - the latter would help to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. A brief written description of the presentation is provided. Consider expanding. A link to the book chapter is provided but it goes to a specific section rather than the top of the chapter. A link from the book chapter is provided. Licensing A copyright license for the presentation is provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 04:17, 18 November 2021 (UTC)