Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2020/Shame, guilt, and recidivism

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Revised sentence to make it third person, added punctuation and remove words for conciseness. --U3177510 (discusscontribs) 13:09, 29 August 2020 (UTC)Reply

Read through and adjusted some spelling errors, changed one in-text reference to align with APA referencing style --Shayley Woodgate (discusscontribs) 08:10, 17 October 2020 (UTC)Reply

Further Reading

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Hi this book chapter is really great and very interesting. If you wanted to read further or expand there a few chapters on recidivism in the Wiley International Handbook of Correctional Psychology (Devon ., et al 2019). --U3202324 (discusscontribs) 11:02, 23 October 2020 (UTC)Reply

Comments

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Hi, This chapter reads really well. The outline is clear, makes sense and is directly relevant to answering the question being asked. I changed a sentence which wasn't complete and fixed one spelling error. I have a few minor comments:

  • Check referencing for your tables - you've referenced this in your paragraph but there should also be a caption for your table which describes where you have gotten this information from.
  • Don't forget with APA formatting you need a reference after each sentence/idea which you have used other's work for. For example "A study investigated the role of reintegrative shaming on recidivism on participants who exceeded the legal blood alcohol content" should have a reference after it, not just at the end of the paragraph.
  • APA formatting requires all initials for authors in the referencing table, not just the first. For example: de Hooge, I. E., Breugelmans, S. M., Wagemans, F. M. A., & Zeelenberg, M.

U3025324 (discusscontribs) 02:46, 17 October 2020 (UTC)Reply


Topic development feedback

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The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

 

Title and sub-title

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  1. Excellent

User page

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  1. Excellent

Social contribution

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  1. Excellent

Section headings

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  1. Well developed 2-level heading structure, with meaningful headings that directly relate to the core topic.
  2. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an overview paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.

Key points

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  1. Key points are well developed for most sections, with relevant citations.
  2. Overview - Consider:
    1. Simplifying and moving some content into subsequent sections
    2. Using bullet-points
    3. Target an international audience; Australians only represent 0.33% of the world population

Image

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  1. An image (figure) is presented.
  2. Caption
    1. uses APA style.
    2. explains how the image connects to key points being made in the main text.
  3. Cite each figure at least once in the main text.

References

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  1. Good.
  2. For APA referencing style, check and correct:
    1. capitalisation

Resources

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    1. Excellent

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 23:36, 13 September 2020 (UTC)Reply

APA referencing, theories and figures

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Hey! Your chapter is looking really great, it is very clear and easy to understand. I have added some suggestions below that you may find useful.

1. Just make sure you refer to pictures as figures rather than images (see Figure 1).

2. Make sure all your citations have dates with them. I think one may have been missing

3. When referencing a theory if does not need to be capitalised for example the dobby effect. You can however capitalise theorist names. See this link for more information https://apastyle.apa.org/style-grammar-guidelines/capitalization/diseases-disorders-therapies

Your chapter is looking great. I hope this feedback helps.

--U3190210 (discusscontribs) 01:23, 16 October 2020 (UTC)Reply


Thanks so much for your feedback! I've made changes based on it :)

--U3190229 (discusscontribs) 05:01, 16 October 2020 (UTC)Reply

Interim feedback

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@U3190229: Some suggestions from a quick look at the current draft:

  1. Overall, looking good; the following comments are relatively minor.
  2. I've made some minor edits
  3. Consider adding wiki links to the first mention of key words such as recidivism. Such wiki links could also go to relevant Wikiversity book chapters.
  4. References:
    1. Check and correct capitalisation. See the UCLearn discussion threads about APA style referencing.
    2. Check and correct spacing (e.g., there should be a space after a period).

Social Contribution

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Your book chapter is very interesting and and very informational. I am definitely linking your book chapter in mine as I would love to refer back to your page for more information about shame and guilt. If I may comment on anything, it would be the the example of "dinting the friends car" in the pretty box. If you were to add a more in detail example or even a in depth case study referring it back to the image, this would tie your book chapter together and your book chapter would really benefit from this. Everything else is great! --U3190523 (discusscontribs) 07:19, 18 October 2020 (UTC)Reply


Chapter review and feedback

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This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via UCLearn, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

 

Overall

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  1. Overall, this is an excellent chapter that successfully uses psychological theory and research to help address a practical, real-world phenomenon or problem.
  2. For additional feedback, see the following comments and these copyedits.
  1. Relevant theories are well selected, described, integrated, and explained.
  1. Relevant research is well reviewed and discussed in relation to theory.
  1. Written expression
    1. Overall, the quality of written expression is excellent.
    2. The chapter benefited from a well developed Overview and Conclusion, with clear focus question(s) and take-home messages.
  2. Layout
    1. The chapter is well structured, with major sections using sub-sections.
  3. Learning features
    1. Good use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles.
    2. Excellent/Very good/Good/Basic/No use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Embedding in-text links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project.
    3. Use in-text interwiki links, rather than external links, per Tutorial 1.
    4. Ideally, use in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to other relevant book chapters. Other links can be moved to the external links section.
    5. Excellent use of image(s). Thankyou for contributing images to Wiki Commons.
    6. Basic use of table(s).
    7. Good use of feature box(es).
    8. Excellent use of quiz(zes).
  4. Grammar, spelling, and proofreading are excellent.
  5. APA style
    1. Use double (not single) quotation marks "to introduce a word or phrase used as an ironic comment, as slang, or as an invented or coined expression; use quotation marks only for the first occurrence of the word or phrase, not for subsequent occurrences" (APA 7th ed., 2020, p. 159).
    2. Citations use correct APA style.
    3. References use correct APA style.
  1. ~15 logged, useful, social contributions with direct links to evidence
  2. Thankyou for your valued social contributions, including adding images to Wiki Commons - much appreciated! Bonus marks added.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 05:29, 15 November 2020 (UTC)Reply


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

 

Overall

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  1. Overall, this is an excellent presentation.
  1. An appropriate amount of content is presented - not too much or too little.
  2. The presentation is well structured.
  3. The presentation is poorly structured (lack of Overview and Conclusion).
  4. Consider adding and narrating an Overview slide (e.g., with focus questions), to help orientate the viewer about what will be covered.
  5. The presentation makes excellent use of theory.
  6. The presentation makes no obvious use of research.
  7. The presentation makes excellent use of one or more examples or case studies.
  1. A Conclusion slide is presented with a take-home message(s).
  2. What are the practical take-home message(s) that we can use to help improve our everyday lives based on the best available psychological theory and research about this topic?
  3. The presentation could be strengthened by adding a Conclusion slide with practical, take-home messages.
  4. The Conclusion did not fit within the time limit.
  1. The presentation is fun, easy to follow, and interesting to watch and listen to.
  2. The presentation makes effective use of animated slides.
  3. Well paced. Excellent pauses between sentences. This helps the viewer to cognitively digest the information that has just been presented before moving on to the next point.
  4. Consider improving articulation to enhance the clarity of speech.
  5. The font size is sufficiently large to make it easy to read.
  6. The visual communication is effectively supplemented by images.
  1. The video is very well produced.
  2. Narrate the opening slide and leave it up for a touch longer.
  3. The sub-title is missing in the opening slide. The title is missing from the video name. These would help to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  4. Audio recording quality was good/a bit quiet.
  5. Visual display quality was excellent.
  6. Image sources and their copyright status are provided.
  7. A copyright license for the presentation is provided.
  8. A link to the book chapter is provided.
  9. A link from the book chapter is provided.
  10. A written description of the presentation is/not provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 09:48, 22 November 2020 (UTC)Reply

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