Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2020/Intranasal oxytocin and emotion

Heading casing

FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for sentence casing. For example, the wikitext should be: == Cats and mice == rather than == Cats and Mice == -- Jtneill - Talk - c 22:04, 13 September 2020 (UTC)

Topic development feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title and sub-title Very good Capitalisation of the title has been corrected to be consistent with the book table of contents User page Created Used effectively About me Consider linking to your eportfolio Link provided to book chapter Social contribution Summarised with indirect link(s) to evidence. Add direct links to evidence. To do this: View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click "compare selected revisions", and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see Making and summarising social contributions. Use a numbered list. Summarised with direct link(s) to evidence. Section headings Promising 2-level heading structure - could benefit from further development e.g., by integrating theories earlier on (e.g., into the What is oxytocin section - avoid too much general background info here and instead summarise and link to related Wikiversity and Wikipedia material). Well developed 2-level heading structure, with meaningful headings that directly relate to the core topic. Overly complicated 3-level structure - consider simplifying. Avoid having sections with 1 sub-heading - use 0 or 2+ sub-headings. See earlier comment about Heading casing. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an overview paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings. Key points Overall, good, focused, if somewhat brief development of key points. Include content introducing a section before branching into sub-sections. Overview - Consider adding: an image. an example or case study. Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to other relevant book chapters. Consider including more examples/case studies. Conclusion (the most important section) hasn't been developed. Image An image (figure) is presented. Caption uses APA style. explains how the image connects to key points being made in the main text. Cite each figure at least once in the main text. References Good. For APA referencing style, check and correct: capitalisation italicisation Resources Very good Include source in brackets after link

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 22:04, 13 September 2020 (UTC)

Link to other oxytocin chapters

Might be worthwhile linking to more Oxytocin chapters, including my own - Relationship between oxytocin and social support :) --U3122220 (discuss • contribs) 13:56, 18 October 2020 (UTC)

Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via UCLearn, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall Overall, this chapter does a reasonably good job of applying psychological theory and research to a real-world problem. For additional feedback, see the following comments and these copyedits. Theory Relevant theory is reasonably well explained, with an appropriate emphasis on evolutionary theory. There is some neuroscience explanation, although this could be expanded, as could perhaps cognitive perspectives. A critical perspective is somewhat evident. Research Relevant research is reasonably well reviewed and discussed in relation to theory. The IN-OT research with clinical populations such as ASD could be expanded. Some claims are unreferenced (e.g., see the tags). When describing important research findings, consider including a bit more detail about the methodology and indicating the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship. Written expression Written expression Overall, the quality of written expression is reasonably good. Use permanent, rather than relative, time references. For example, instead of "20 years ago", refer to something like "at the beginning of the 21st century". In this way, the text will survive better into the future, without needing to be rewritten. Use 3rd person perspective rather than 1st (e.g., "we") or 2nd person (e.g., "you")[1] in the main text, although 1st or 2nd person perspective can work well for case studies or feature boxes. Avoid one sentence paragraphs. A paragraph should typically consist of three to five sentences. Learning features No use of embedded in-text interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. Adding interwiki links for the first mention of key words and technical concepts would make the text more interactive. See example. No use of embedded in-text links to related book chapters. Embedding in-text links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project. Use in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to other relevant book chapters. Basic use of image(s). No use of feature box(es). No use of quiz(zes). Basic use of case studies or examples. Grammar The grammar for some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the tags). Check and make correct use of commas. Check and correct use of affect vs. effect. Use serial commas[2] - they are part of APA style and are generally recommended by grammaticists. Here's a 1 min. explanatory video. APA style Use double (not single) quotation marks "to introduce a word or phrase used as an ironic comment, as slang, or as an invented or coined expression; use quotation marks only for the first occurrence of the word or phrase, not for subsequent occurrences" (APA 7th ed., 2020, p. 159). Do not capitalise the names of disorders, therapies, theories, etc.. Figures and tables Refer to each Table and Figure using APA style (e.g., do not use italics). Citations are not in full APA style. For example: When citations are used in parentheses at the end of a sentence, the full stop should come after the closing parentheses. If there are three or more authors, cite the first author followed by et al., then year. For example, either: in-text, Smith et al. (2020), or in parentheses (Smith et al., 2020) References are not in full APA style. For example: Check and correct use of capitalisation. Check and correct use of italicisation. Move non-peer-reviewed sources to the external links section. Social contribution 1 logged, useful, social contributions with direct links to evidence.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 21:03, 28 November 2020 (UTC)

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall Overall, this is a good presentation. Structure and content Comments about the book chapter also apply to this section. An appropriate amount of content is presented. The presentation is well structured. Consider adding and narrating an Overview slide (e.g., with focus questions), to help orientate the viewer about what will be covered. The presentation makes very good use of relevant theory. The presentation makes good use of relevant research. The presentation could be improved by making more use of examples or case studies. A Conclusion slide is presented with a take-home message(s). Communication The presentation makes basic use of text based slides with narrated audio. Consider slowing down and leaving longer pauses between sentences. This can help the viewer to cognitively digest the information that has just been presented before moving on to the next point. Consider using greater intonation to enhance listener interest and engagement. The font size is sufficiently large to make it easy to read. The visual communication is effectively supplemented by images. Production quality The video is basically produced using simple tools. The chapter title and sub-title are used on the opening slide - this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. The chapter title but not the sub-title are used in the name of presentation - the latter would help to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. Audio recording quality was good. Visual display quality was very good. Image sources and their copyright status are provided. A copyright license for the presentation is provided. A link to the book chapter is provided. A link from the book chapter is provided. A brief written description of the presentation is provided. Consider expanding.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 00:09, 29 November 2020 (UTC)