Latest comment: 6 years ago1 comment1 person in discussion
The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.
Make sure to concentrate on addressing the question - e.g., we don't need much about "About the Thai cave rescue" because that is so well covered elsewhere - provide a very brief summary (e.g., in the Overview) and link to the Wikipedia article about the topic for more info. That way this chapter can concentrate on the psychological aspects, particularly those related to motivation and emotion.
Taking a chronological approach probably makes sense - e.g., what motivated the boys and coach to go into the cave in the first place etc. A character approach would be an alternative structure (e.g., boys, coach, families, rescuers, public)
Latest comment: 5 years ago1 comment1 person in discussion
The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.
The topic as it is currently worded doesn't justify a singular focus on one individual, although as a key figure Harris could be used for a case study focus - e.g., why not also consider, for example, the motivation for the boys/coach to enter the cave? The emotions of families and the world watching? etc.
Only brief description of "About the Thai cave rescue" is needed to highlight key features that you subsequently discussion. Provide internal links to Wikipedia material for more detail.
Key points are well developed for each section, but there is a lack of relevant citation.
Consider including more interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles.
Consider embedding one quiz question per major section rather than having one longer quiz towards the end.
Latest comment: 5 years ago1 comment1 person in discussion
This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via UCLearn Canvas, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.
Why focus on one person? Better to address the topic, perhaps using particularly people or groups of people as examples/case studies.
The focus aside, the chapter provides an interesting and useful account using a wide range of relevant theories and some associated research to explore the emotions and motives of one of the rescuers. However, there is a notable lack of referencing about facts involved in the rescue.
Consider noting that although the boys and the coach were rescued, the resounding success was nevertheless affected by the death of the one of the rescuers - emotions such as grief, fear etc. therefore should also be considered and explored.
Overview is reasonable; to improve, add focus questions and an image.
For additional feedback, see comments below and these copyedits.
There is too much initial, general historical material. Instead, summarise and link to further information (such as Wikipedia articles), to allow this chapter to focus on the specific topic (i.e., the sub-title question).
The Reeve (2018) textbook is overused as a citation - instead, utilise primary, peer-reviewed sources.
Use third person perspective rather than first person (e.g., "we") or second person (e.g., "you") perspective.
Layout
Sections which include sub-sections should also include an introductory paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.
The chapter is reasonably well structured.
Learning features
Very basic use of interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. Adding more interwiki links for the first mention of key words would make the text more interactive.
No use of embedded links to related book chapters. Embedding interwiki links links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project.
Basic use of images.
No use of tables.
No use of feature boxes.
Basic use of quizzes.
The quiz questions could be more effective as learning prompts by being embedded as single questions within each corresponding section rather than being presented as a set of questions at the end.
Spelling
Use Australian spelling (e.g., hypothesize vs. hypothesise; behavior vs. behaviour; fulfillment vs. fulfilment).
APA style
References are not in full APA style. For example:
Latest comment: 5 years ago1 comment1 person in discussion
The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Canvas site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.
Several of the comments about the book chapter also apply here.
The content is interesting but somewhat speculative about a specific person's emotion and motivation during a specific event. There was no need to focus specifically on an individual (given the broader topic), although individuals could have provided useful case studies.
An appropriate amount of content is presented - not too much or too little.
Add and narrate an Overview slide (e.g., with focus questions), to help orientate the viewer about what will be covered.
The presentation could be strengthened by adding a Conclusion slide with practical, take-home messages.
The chapter title but not the sub-title are used in the video title - the latter would help to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
The chapter title and sub-title are used on the opening slide - this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
Audio recording quality was OK - there was some white noise, a couple of skips between slides, and keyboard clicks. Probably an on-board microphone was used. Consider using an external microphone.
Visual display quality was good.
Image sources and their copyright status are not provided. Either acknowledge the image sources and their licenses in the video description or remove the presentation.
A copyright license for the presentation is not provided.
A link to the book chapter is not provided.
A link from the book chapter is provided.
A written description of the presentation is not provided.
