Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2019/Near-death experiences and emotion

Comments

Hey just looked through your work. Just saw a few things that could be fixed up. Your see also does not have any links so I can't click on them and find out what they are. Also the references could be slightly fixed up with the doi getting https:// put in front so it becomes a clickable link as well. Apparently you also don't need the issue number in the reference. Here is what it should look like: Konopka, L. (2015). Near death experience: neuroscience perspective. Croatian Medical Journal, 56, 392-393. https://doi:10.3325/cmj.2015.56.392. Good luck with the assignment --Cass1804 (discuss • contribs) 23:53, 11 October 2019 (UTC)

Heading casing

FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings (or sentence casing). For example, use: ==Cats and dogs== rather than ==Cats and Dogs== -- Jtneill - Talk - c 11:12, 30 August 2019 (UTC)

Topic development feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title and sub-title Excellent User page Created, with brief description about self and link to book chapter Social contribution Well summarised Add direct links to evidence. To do this: View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click "compare selected revisions", and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see Making and summarising social contributions. Section headings Well developed 2-level heading structure, but note that only sections 4 and 5 directly address the topic (the sub-title) - consider expanding these sections, perhaps with sub-headings. Avoid providing too much background/generic material. Instead briefly summarise background concepts and provide wiki links to further information. Then focus for most of the content can then be on directly answering the core question posed by the chapter sub-title. Key points Check/correct grammar e.g., NDE's -> NDEs Consider using gender-neutral language e.g., mankind -> humankind Consider including more examples/case studies (e.g., in the Overview) Key points are reasonably well developed for each section, with some relevant citations. The main area to improve is a greater emphasis on the range of emotional responses to different types of NDEs, comparing and contrasting different theoretical perspectives integrated with research evidence. Consider embedding one quiz question per major section. Image Provided, with an APA style caption Cite each figure at least once in the main text. References Good. The hanging indent template can be applied once to all references rather than individually to each reference (fixed) For full APA style: Remove date after "Retrieved from"; preferably just use a doi instead of "Retrieved from" Use the new recommended format for dois - http://blog.apastyle.org/apastyle/2014/07/how-to-use-the-new-doi-format-in-apa-style.html Use correct capitalisation Use correct italicisation Do not include issue numbers for journals which are continuously numbered within a volume Resources Use bullet-points (fixed) Use sentence casing See also Use internal wiki links Rename links so that they are more user friendly Also link to past relevant chapters External links Rename links so that they are more user friendly

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 22:07, 23 September 2019 (UTC)

Contribution

Hey, i've just read through your chapter and its very interesting, however after some quick research i found that depending on peoples culture/background and religious beliefs they can influence the type of near death experience people have and what types of things people may see - for example a lot of Indian people report seeing the Hindu king of the dead instead of "god". Ive linked a relevant article that may be a good starting point for you and you can probably mention it under the "spitirs/divine beings" heading in your chapter :)--U3160677 (discuss • contribs) 05:20, 20 October 2019 (UTC)

Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via UCLearn Canvas, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall Overall, this is an excellent that successfully explains psychological theory and related research to help address a practical, real-world phenomenon or problem. For additional feedback, see following comments and these copyedits. Theory Relevant theories are well selected, described, and explained. A balanced perspective is evident. Research Relevant research is well reviewed and discussed in relation to theory. Useful examples and case studies are provided. Appropriate description of research study methodology and effect sizes are provided. Written expression Written expression Overall, the quality of written expression is very good. Avoid directional referencing (e.g., "As previously mentioned"). Instead, use section linking. The chapter benefited from a well developed Overview and Conclusion, with clear focus question(s) and take-home messages. Layout Avoid having sections with only one sub-section. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an introductory paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings. Learning features Excellent use of embedded interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. No use of embedded links to related book chapters. Embedding links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project. Basic use of images. No use of tables. Excellent use of feature boxes. Use 100% width. Excellent use of quizzes. Grammar The grammar for some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the tags). Check and correct use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's vs individuals').[1]. Check and correct use of that vs. who. Use serial commas[2] - it is part of APA style and generally recommended by grammaticists. Abbreviations Abbreviations (such as e.g., i.e.., etc.) should only be used inside parentheses. APA style Direct quotes need page numbers. Figures and tables Use APA style to refer to each Table and each Figure (e.g., do not use italics, check and correct capitalisation). Citations are not in full APA style. For example: A serial comma is needed before "&" or "and" for citations involving three or more authors. References are not in full APA style. For example: Check and correct use of capitalisation. Check and correct use of italicisation. See new doi format. Social contribution ~6 logged social contributions; most without direct links to evidence

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 11:02, 24 November 2019 (UTC)

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Canvas site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall Overall, this is an excellent presentation. This presentation makes creative and effective use of simple tools. Structure and content An appropriate amount of content is presented - not too much or too little. The presentation is wellstructured. Add and narrate an Overview slide (e.g., with focus questions), to help orientate the viewer about what will be covered. A Conclusion slide is presented with a take-home message(s). Communication The presentation is interesting to watch and listen to. Possible too much text is presented; summarise. The presentation makes effective use of text and image based slides with narrated audio. Well paced. Excellent pauses between sentences. This helps the viewer to cognitively digest the information. Some of the font size should be larger to make it easier to read. The visual communication is effectively supplemented by images. Production quality Communicate the chapter title and sub-title in both the video title and on the opening slide - this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. Audio recording quality was very good. Visual display quality was very good. Image sources and their copyright status are provided. A copyright license for the presentation is provided. A link to the book chapter is provided. A link from the book chapter is provided. A written description of the presentation is provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 11:10, 24 November 2019 (UTC)