Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2019/Bulimia nervosa and extrinsic motivation

Heading casing

FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings (or sentence casing). For example, use: ==Cats and dogs== rather than ==Cats and Dogs== -- Jtneill - Talk - c 02:16, 29 August 2019 (UTC)

@U3174167: FYI, this heading casing convention should apply to the title, sub-title, and headings. Sincerely, James -- Jtneill - Talk - c 02:44, 29 August 2019 (UTC)

Comment

This looks like a really interesting topic to be working on! May I suggest a section towards the end of your chapter discussing the alternatives to extrinsic motivators - shedding light on more intrinsic motives within the disease and its recovery. If so, you may find this series of articles beneficial.

Hey, this chapter is looking extremely interesting. It would be really great to look at the importance of social media and how that can affect someone and if looking at edited photos or photos of models/influencers works as a motivation. Really looking forward to reading more about this subject.--U3162204 (discuss • contribs) 08:20, 19 October 2019 (UTC) https://onlinelibrary-wiley-com.ezproxy.canberra.edu.au/doi/full/10.1002/erv.2154

Hi there, this is a really informative and well set out book chapter. To adhere to APA each figure must be referred to in the main text. e.g. An example of thinspiration is evident in Figure 4. Great job--Samuel Moorby (discuss • contribs) 08:38, 20 October 2019 (UTC)

Hi there, I really enjoyed reading your chapter. I am writing a chapter on exercise addiction and thought I would suggest for you to add some information about exercise addiction that comes as a primary or secondary factor with Bulimia. U3145835

--U3100384 (discuss • contribs) 00:25, 31 August 2019 (UTC)

Topic development feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title and sub-title Wording and capitalisation of the title/sub-title has been corrected to be consistent with the book table of contents User page Created, with description about self Add link to book chapter Social contribution Summarised with indirect links to evidence. Add direct links to evidence. To do this: View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click "compare selected revisions", and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see Making and summarising social contributions. Section headings Basic, 2-level heading structure - could benefit from further development to refine focus away from background content and towards content directly addressing the sub-title question. Avoid providing too much background information. Instead, briefly summarise generic concepts and provide internal wiki links to further information. Then the focus of most of the content can be on directly answering the core question(s) posed by the chapter sub-title. Key points Trigger warning removed - not needed as the target audience is a general audience, not a specifically vulnerable audience. Spell out abbreviations (e.g., yr, DSM) at least on first mention to set up their use; but in general avoid abbreviating. Remove excessive capitalisation - e.g., see correct capitalisation in bulimia nervosa (Wikipedia). Lack of development of key points which directly address the topic. Overview - Consider adding focus questions. Consider including more examples/case studies such as one that shows successful application of recommended strategies for dealing with extrinsic motivators of bulimic behaviour based on the critical review of academic literature in this chapter. Consider embedding one quiz question per major section rather than having one longer quiz towards the end. Image An image (figure) is presented. Caption could better explain how the image connects to key points being made in the main text addressing the sub-title question. Cite each figure at least once in the main text. References Good. For full APA style: Use the new recommended format for dois - http://blog.apastyle.org/apastyle/2014/07/how-to-use-the-new-doi-format-in-apa-style.html Do not include issue numbers for journals which are continuously numbered within a volume Alphabetical order Correct capitalisation Resources Excellent

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 03:53, 29 September 2019 (UTC)

Title

Hi there, just noticed that your title is not consistent with your topic - you have: "Bulimia nervosa and extrinsic motivation: What extrinsic motivational factors contribute to anorexia nervosa?" From what I can see, you are focussing on Bulimia Nervosa and not Anorexia Nervosa, so you may need to update the question part of your title :) --U3173480 (discuss • contribs) 05:53, 10 October 2019 (UTC)

Suggestion

This looks like a really interesting topic and a great start! As a suggestion, maybe including something about the impact of social media on the development of bulimia nervosa and the motivation involved in continuing. A journal article by Amon (2018) talks about the popular hashtag of 'thinspiration' which is wide spread on social media platforms such as facebook, instagram, tumblr and twitter. It provides a community of people who have a range of eating disorders, including bulimia nervosa in order to get the ideal body image of being thin. The external factors here is that people get positive peer feedback about the actions they undertake when they conform with the group and these act as external rewards to continue. This could also be linked in with self determination theory as it fulfils the three basic human emotions, the autonomy to engage in bulimic activities, the competence to be able to continue and pursue the ideal body image and the relatedness that the 'thinspiration' community can provide. It also seems like an important topic to address as it is a relatable example, and with the growing impact of social communities, its becoming more and more common.

Best of luck with your book chapter!

References

Amon, A. (2018). Sharing the Pain in Social Media: A Content Analysis of# thinspiration Images on Instagram.

--U3175511 (discuss • contribs) 10:12, 10 October 2019 (UTC)

Comment

This seems like a really interesting topic to be working on. I enjoyed reading through what you have written about so far. Don't forget to read your work out loud or get someone external to have a read through for grammar. Well done though! --U3158296 (discuss • contribs) 23:37, 18 October 2019 (UTC)

Body Image suggestion

Hey, i've just read through your chapter and it looks great so far! i just have one suggestion to make, under the heading "body image" you may like to discuss how those who suffer from Bilimia Nervosa tend to see themselves as bigger than they actually are due to distortions of their perception, i've linked a journal article which may be useful as it tests participants who suffer from Bulimia Nervousa and how they estimate the size of objects. Hope this helps :) --U3160677 (discuss • contribs) 03:03, 20 October 2019 (UTC)

Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via UCLearn Canvas, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall Overall, this is a good chapter that uses psychological theory and research to help address a practical, real-world phenomenon or problem. The Overview case study is useful and engaging. Consider building on the sub-title by presenting focus questions to help guide the reader and the chapter structure. For additional feedback, see comments below and these copyedits. Theory There is too much general theoretical material (e.g., about bulimia). Instead, summarise and link to further information (such as the Wikipedia article about bulimia), then refine the focus of this chapter to the specific topic (i.e., the sub-title question). The chapter starts to address the topic about half-way through. Relevant theories are well selected, described, and explained. The chapter emphasises negative influences of extrinsic motivators on bulimia. Also consider the possibility of positive influences (e.g., social media which encourages a healthy acceptance of body / body image). Research Relevant research is reviewed and discussed in relation to theory. Greater emphasis on major reviews and/or meta-analyses would be helpful. Written expression Written expression Overall, the quality of written expression is reasonable but there is room for improvement to bring it closer to a professional standard. Some paragraphs are overly long. Each paragraph should communicate one key idea in three to five sentences. Avoid overstating claims (e.g., "extremely"). Layout The chapter is well structured. Learning features Excellent use of interwiki links to Wikipedia articles. No use of embedded links to related book chapters. Embedding interwiki links links to related book chapters helps to integrate this chapter into the broader book project. Good use of images. Consider adjusting display size to make diagrams easier to read. Excellent use of tables. Basic use of feature boxes. Basic use of quizzes. Ideally the quiz questions should relate directly to the main topic of the chapter. Basic use of case studies or examples. Grammar The grammar for some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the tags). Check and correct use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's vs individuals').[1]. Use serial commas[2] - it is part of APA style and generally recommended by grammaticists. Spelling Spelling can be improved (e.g., see the tags). Proofreading More proofreading is needed to fix typos and bring the quality of written expression closer to a professional standard. Figures and tables Use APA style to refer to each Table and each Figure (e.g., do not use italics). Refer to each Table and Figure at least once within the main text (e.g., see Figure 1). Citations are not in full APA style. For example: Use ampersand (&) inside brackets and "and" outside brackets. References are not in full APA style. For example: Check and correct use of capitalisation. See new doi format. Social contribution ~3 logged social contributions without direct links to evidence

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 10:22, 12 November 2019 (UTC)

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Canvas site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall Overall, this is a basic presentation. This presentation makes good use of simple tools. Structure and content Many of the comments about the book chapter also apply to this section. Well selected content - not too much or too little. The presentation is well structured (Title, Body, Conclusion). Add and narrate an Overview slide, to help orientate the viewer about what will be covered. A Conclusion slide is presented with a take-home message(s). Communication The presentation is easy to follow. The presentation makes basic use of text and image based slides with narrated audio. Well paced. Consider using greater intonation to enhance listener interest and engagement. Some of the font size should be larger to make it easier to read. The visual communication is supplemented by images. Production quality Use both the chapter title and sub-title on the opening slide and in the name of the video because this helps to match the book chapter and to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. Audio recording quality was OK. Video recording quality was OK. Image sources and their copyright status are provided, but there are no active hyperlinks to the images. A copyright license for the presentation is not provided. A link to the book chapter is provided. A link from the book chapter is not provided. A written description of the presentation is not provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 01:14, 17 November 2019 (UTC)