Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2017/Dualistic model of passion

Heading casing

FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use: ==Cats and dogs== rather than ==Cats and Dogs== -- Jtneill - Talk - c 00:52, 1 September 2017 (UTC)

Topic development review and feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks will be available later via Moodle. Keep an eye on Announcements. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title, sub-title, TOC Capitalisation and wording of the title/sub-title has been corrected to be consistent with the book table of contents User page Created Used effectively Social contribution Well summarised contribution but the quality of the linking can be improved to make it easier to see the evidence - the best links go to direct evidence of the contributions made. View the page history, select the version of the page before and after your contributions, click compare, and then use this website address as a direct link to evidence for listing on your user page. For more info, see the book chapter author guidelines. Section headings Seems to be missing a section explaining the dualistic model of passion? Probably needs a stronger theoretical and research basis. Emphasis on applications is excellent The earlier 2-level and more recent 1-level heading both seem simple, applied, logical and useful. Key points A key points is provided for each section, usually with citation. Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles. Consider embedding one quiz question per major section rather than having one longer quiz towards the end. Image One image embedded Consider increasing image size from default Remove overcapitalisation in caption References OK For full APA style: Use correct capitalisation Use correct italicisation Do not include issue numbers for journals which are continuously numbered within a volume Resources Excellent

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 12:15, 16 October 2017 (UTC)

Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall Overall, this is a solid chapter. For additional feedback, see these copyedits. Theory The theory is well described, with four clear applications. The theory is related to other theories, such as self-determination theory. The evolution and development of the theory could be better explained. The Conclusion should be developed into sentences and paragraphs. Research Research relating passion to the areas of application. Some statements were unreferenced - see the tags The section about the Passion Scale could be more interesting and useful if it provided some example items and description of the factors - otherwise it is probably not that interesting or useful to a lay reader. When describing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship. Greater emphasis on major reviews and meta-analyses would be helpful. Written expression Written expression Some paragraphs are overly long. Each paragraph should communicate one key idea in three to five sentences. Avoid one sentence paragraphs. A paragraph should typically consist of three to five sentences. Some of the bullet-points should have been in full paragraph format, particularly the Conclusion. Layout The structuring of the chapter around four areas of application of the model is both a strength and weakness. A strength is that it emphasises applications. A weakness is that it limits the development of theoretical depth. Learning features Consider incorporating one image and one scenario per major section/application of passion. Adding more interwiki links would make the text more interactive. Spelling, grammar and proofreading Check and correct use of ownership apostrophes e.g., individuals -> individual's APA style There are two Figure 1s Numbers under 10 should be written in words (e.g., five); numbers 10 and over should be written in numbers (e.g., 10) Provide more detailed Figure captions References are not in full APA style e.g., Check and correct italicisation Do not include issue numbers for journals which are continuously numbered within volumes.

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall Overall, this a basic presentation. Structure and content Comments about the book chapter also apply to this section, particularly the excessive focus on sport. Whilst sport can be used as an example, it should not be the focus. The presentation could be strengthened by adding a Conclusion slide with practical, take-home messages. Communication The presentation makes reasonably effective use of narrated text and image based slides with narrated audio. Production quality Use the full chapter title and sub-title on the opening slide and in the name of the video because this helps to match the book chapter and to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. Audio and video recording quality was excellent. Audio recording quality was a bit quiet - review microphone set up.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 03:35, 28 November 2017 (UTC)