Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2014/Happiness and health

Quiz

Hey I saw your post on moodle about adding a quiz, I've put the syntax in for the quiz under the heading 'Test yourself', all you have to do now is add the questions you want to be test on :) I'm not sure what the syntax is for a short answer type question though, sorry. I hope this helps! When we had to select our topics this was the topic I was wanting but you beat me to it, so I was really keen to see where you went with it. Just looking over it now and I really like how you have touched on physical, mental and social aspects of health. Other aspects of health that you may be interested in looking at could be spiritual health or even emotional health. I look forward to reading your finished book chapter, good luck! :) U3081383 (discuss • contribs) 02:10, 13 October 2014 (UTC)

Really like your idea of using a personal story 'Ellie' to guide the reader through the different concepts you present- great work! Layout is looking great as well. Im looking at the influence of emotion (both positive and negative) on goal attainment, although struggling to find information regarding the Theories of emotion. Don't know if you have looked into this part much yet, the problem I have found is there seems to be A LOT of different theories, have you found any useful articles? --Emily (discuss • contribs) 10:27, 12 October 2014 (UTC)

Congratulations on the great article so far. My topic is religiosity and mental health however i still found this topic quite relevant. I think there is definate potential for you to examine religious/spiritual aspects of health and its relationship with happiness. My findings have been quite conclusive that there is a distinct relationship between the two elements. --JacquelineSpence (discuss • contribs) 11:54, 16 October 2014 (UTC)

I really enjoyed the quiz at the end that you included within your book chapter. Thought it was a great idea to get the audience more involved and hands on. Defiantly a well structured and thought out book chapter, good work! --Bella_wilson (discuss • contribs) 4:29, 27 October 2014

Feedback on draft so far

FYI, I've had a quick skim over this chapter so far. Some suggestions:

1. The overall layout, headings, structure, etc. looks good.
2. The embedded case study example works well.
3. There is info about happiness and about health, but not so much about how happiness affects health, which is the key purpose/focus of the chapter and the most critical aspect which could be improved.
4. Re research - have the top research references on this topic been identified and utilised? e.g., [1]
5. Re theory - as for research, have the top relevant theory references on this topic been identified? e.g., [2], [3]. You might also be interested in salutogenic theory by Aaron Antonvosky e.g., see salutogenesis.
6. Re written expression:
   1. Add inter-wiki (internal) links to other relevant book chapters and Wikipedia articles. These can be in-text, when relevant topics/phrases appear (on first occasion) and/or in the See also section. The material currently in See also should be moved into External links.
   2. For the References section, remove the manual numbering and precede with hashtags and no line spaces between the references. Also check APA style for reference formatting e.g., indent (see Moodle forum discussion for an easy way to do this), italics, capitalisation
   3. Use APA style for Figure captioning. The second image caption could benefit from additional explanation in the caption. Perhaps consider adding some additional images.

I hope this helps - let me know if I can do anything else. Sincerely, James -- Jtneill - Talk - c 10:41, 21 October 2014 (UTC)

APA style figure captions

Good to see images with APA style figure captions. Note that the Figure 1 part should be in italics. More info: http://libguides.newcastle.edu.au/content.php?pid=113807&sid=1208571 -- Jtneill - Talk - c 11:10, 23 October 2014 (UTC)

I think that only the authors surname (and not first initial)needs to be included in the in-text referencing. ie. (Reeve, 2009) rather than (Reeve. J., 2009)--Emily (discuss • contribs) 09:48, 25 October 2014 (UTC)

Wiki links

I recommend adding more:

• internal links between this chapter and other Motivation and emotion/Book chapters
• internal links to Wikipedia articles about key concepts discussed in this chapter

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 01:08, 24 October 2014 (UTC)

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener. If you wish to dispute the marks, see the suggested marking dispute process.

Overall Overall, this is a basic but competent presentation - well done. Structure and content A well designed and organised presentation. The multimedia presentation does a competent job of informing the viewer about how happiness effects health, however, the link could be made clearer. The presentation provides a good overview of relevant theory and research, although links to theory could be stronger, and displays logical flow between concepts. An initial overview slide or explanation of the presentation's structure would be helpful to the viewer who isn't sure what will be covered. In text references are provided, however, there is no end of text reference list. A good conclusion and take home message slide is provided. Communication Communication is OK. The audio component is rushed (ill-paced) and therefore quite difficult to understand at times. There is little use of images, colour, case studies and other illustrative examples – this could have significantly improved the presentation. All in all the communication is quite basic and could be made more engaging for the viewer. Production quality The presentation had good picture quality and demonstrated good use of a basic production tool (Jing) to communicate ideas. Audio quality, however, could have been improved significantly by using a louder, clearer voice at a bigger distance from the microphone due to some echo/vibration that occurs after speaking – this is very distracting. Other background noise such as tapping the keyboard was also detected. Rehearsing the presentation and eliminating casual language such as “umm” and other mistakes would have given the presentation the element of professionalism that it lacks. No copyright license is acknowledged. No reference list or acknowledgement of images used is provided. A link is provided from the book chapter to the presentation, however, no link is provided to the book chapter from the presentation.

RenaeLN (discuss • contribs) 07:11, 21 November 2014 (UTC)

Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall Overall, this is a rich and varied chapter, with many useful features. The main areas for improvement include shortening (it is over the word count) by reducing the amount of material on describing the broader concepts, and focusing more on theory and research which relate directly to the topic/question. The quality of written expression could also be improved. For more feedback, see my copyedits and comments below. Theory Coverage of theory could be more substantial by using more peer-reviewed sources as the key citations e.g., more peer-reviewed sources should be used as the basis for defining and describing happiness. Overall, there was relatively too much coverage of general theories of separate concepts (e.g., happiness and personality) and not enough emphasis on theory about the relationship between happiness and health. Research Research could be covered in more depth When describing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship. Some statements were unreferenced - see the tags Written expression Written expression could be improved Avoid one sentence paragraphs. A paragraph should typically consist of three to five sentences. Some paragraphs were overly long. Each paragraph should communicate one key idea in three to five sentences. The quality of written expression could be improved where clarification templates have been added to the page. The chapter provides an excellent range of relevant links to other pages. The text could become more interactive by including interwiki links. Some links to Wikipedia and/or Wikiversity articles were added as external links - these should be changed to interwiki links Spelling, grammar and proofreading The grammar for some sentences could be improved - see the tags Use abbreviations such as "e.g." inside brackets and "for example" outside brackets Check/correct APA style for citations e.g., (Yates, D., 2011) -> (Yates, 2011). APA style Direct quotes need page numbers. Provide links to articles in the reference list, not the citation Check/correct APA style for the reference list - e.g., capitalisation and issue numbers

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 00:14, 27 November 2014 (UTC)