Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2019/Outdoor education and achievement motivation

Heading casing

FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings (or sentence casing). For example, use: ==Cats and dogs== rather than ==Cats and Dogs== -- Jtneill - Talk - c 10:32, 29 September 2019 (UTC)

Topic development feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title and sub-title Good Capitalisation of the title/sub-title has been corrected to be consistent with the book table of contents User page Created Description about self Add link to book chapter Social contribution None summarised with links to evidence. Section headings Under-developed, 1-level heading structure - develop further, perhaps using a 2-level structure for the largest section(s). See earlier comment about Heading casing. Avoid providing too much background information. Briefly summarise generic concepts and provide internal wiki links to further information. Then focus most of the content on directly answering the core question(s) posed by the chapter sub-title. Key points Overview - Consider adding focus questions. Consider introducing a case study in the Overview. Consider adding an image to the Overview. Reasonable development of key points for each section, with relevant citations. Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles and/or to other relevant book chapters. Consider including more examples/case studies. Consider embedding one quiz question per major section. Image None References Good. For full APA style, use: the new recommended format for dois no issue numbers for journals which are continuously numbered within a volume (i.e., most of them). Resources None

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 10:32, 29 September 2019 (UTC)

Hi! Your chapter is very interesting. I just have a few recommendations regarding your referencing. You don't need to have them numbered, just include a hanging indent to separate them. I went ahead and did this for you, you may want to remove the numbering :)

Good luck! --Maddiebunday (discuss • contribs) 11:41, 20 October 2019 (UTC)

Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via UCLearn Canvas, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall Overall, this is a basic, but sufficient chapter. There is a promising focus on theory, but it struggles to integrate outdoor education and achievement motivation, largely treating these as separate concepts. The quality of written expression, particularly grammar, is below professional standard. Overview - Expand and consider building on the sub-title by presenting focus questions to help guide the reader and the chapter structure. Conclusion - add one See also and External links - add bullet-points (per Tutorial 1) References - remove numbering (APA style) For additional feedback, see comments below and these copyedits. Theory Reasonably good overview of relevant theory. The description of outdoor education is not tailored towards achievement motivation. OE and AM are largely dealt with as separate constructs. There is some promising attempt to integrate them, but more could be done in this respect. More examples or case studies would be helpful. Research General research is reasonably well reviewed and discussed in relation to theory, however there was scope to identify more specific research related to OE and AM. It was good to see that at least one meta-analysis was reviewed. Ideally, drill down into the achievement-related outcomes. When describing important research findings, consider including a bit more detail about the methodology and indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship. Written expression Written expression Overall, the quality of written expression is below professional standard. Some paragraphs are overly long. Each paragraph should communicate one key idea in three to five sentences. Lengthy direct quotes are over used - better to express ideas in your own words. Direct quotes should be embedded within sentences and paragraphs, rather than dumped holus-bolus. Even better, communicate the concept in your own words. The chapter would benefit from a more developed Overview and Conclusion, with clearer focus question(s) (Overview) and take-home self-help message for each focus question (Conclusion). Layout Avoid having sections with one sub-section - have no sub-sections or at least two sub-sections. Why wasn't the topic development feedback addressed? e.g., see earlier comments about heading casing. Learning features Use in-text interwiki links, rather than external links. Basic use of Interwiki links. Embedding interwiki links links to related book chapters would help to integrate this chapter into the broader book project. Basic use of uncaptioned images. No use of tables. No use of feature boxes. No use of quizzes. The quiz questions could be more effective as learning prompts by being embedded as single questions within each corresponding section rather than being presented as a set of questions at the end. Excellent/Very good/Good/Basic/No use of case studies or examples. For numbered lists, use Wikiversity formatting per Tutorial 1. Grammar The grammar for some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the tags). Sentences should start with capital letters. Check and correct use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's). Check and correct use of affect vs. effect. APA style Use APA style for Figure captions. See example. Social contribution No logged social contributions

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 10:56, 7 November 2019 (UTC)

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Canvas site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall Overall, this is an insufficient presentation because the focus is not directly on the target topic. Structure and content Strange introductory slide about stresses. Instead add and narrate a Title slide which contains the topic title and the sub-title, to help the viewer understanding the focus and goal of the presentation. There is too much general background info; and not enough about the relationship between OE and AM. The focus is on largely unrelated content - the focus is on stress and resilience rather than OE and AM. Add and narrate an Overview slide (e.g., with focus questions), to help orientate the viewer (and the presenter!) about what will be covered. The presentation could be strengthened by adding a Conclusion slide with practical, take-home messages which relate direct to the topic (and address the sub-title question). Communication The presentation format is fun and interesting, but it is insufficiently focused on the target topic. Well paced. The font size is sufficiently large to make it easy to read. The visual communication is effectively supplemented by images. Production quality Communicate the chapter title and sub-title in both the video title and on the opening slide this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. Audio recording quality was poor - music is distracting and it sounds like there was a crow in the background? Video recording quality was excellent. Mute the music during narration to help the viewer concentrate on the combination of visual information and narrated audio. Image source is provided. A copyright license for the presentation is not provided. A link to the book chapter is not provided. A link from the book chapter is provided. A written description of the presentation is not provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 11:20, 17 November 2019 (UTC)

Multimedia feedback resubmission

1. Overall, this is a very good presentation that makes effective use of simple tools.
2. Full title and sub-title provided on opening slide.
3. Title only provided in video title.
4. Overview slide provided with focus questions.
5. An appropriate amount of content is presented - not too much or too little.
6. Citation and reference for the meta-analysis?
7. Conclusion slide presented with a clear, simple take-home message.
8. No copyright license provided in the video description or video meta-data. A license is indicated on the final slide.
9. No powtoon acknowledgement is provided.