Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2019/Mother-child emotion talk

Latest comment: 5 years ago by Jtneill in topic Multimedia feedback

Heading casing

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FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings (or sentence casing). For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 06:05, 31 August 2019 (UTC)Reply


Topic development feedback

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The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

 

Title and sub-title

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  1. Excellent

User page

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  1. Created, with description about self and link to book chapter
  2. Used effectively

Social contribution

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  1. Excellent

Section headings

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  1. Well developed 2-level heading structure, with meaningful headings that directly relate to the core topic.
  2. Avoid providing too much background information. Instead, briefly summarise generic concepts and provide internal wiki links to further information. Then the focus of most of the content can be on directly answering the core question(s) posed by the chapter sub-title. For example, consider narrowing the section on "emotions" to focus on infant/child emotions and parent emotions.

Key points

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  1. Excellent use of case studies
  2. Provide an intro paragraph under each heading, even if it has sub-sections.
  3. Key points are well developed for each section, with relevant citations.
  4. Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles.

Image

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  1. Provided, with an APA style caption
  2. Cite each figure at least once in the main text.

References

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  1. Very good.
  2. For full APA style:
    1. Do not include issue numbers for journals which are continuously numbered within a volume

Resources

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  1. Use bullet-points
  2. External links
    1. Include source in brackets after the link

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 07:56, 25 September 2019 (UTC)Reply

Feedback near due date:

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Well done on the book chapter. I originally went searching for yours specifically to provide feedback on, as I thought it would link to my topic (Relationship commitment phobia), as I mention parent-child relationships in my assessment item. I purposefully left commenting on yours until towards the end, as I wanted to see what direction you took. Not the direction I thought you would, by the research I did for my topic, however I think it is really well done, and probably better than I thought it could be. You were quite concise, but went into great detail. That's a good talent to have in academic writing. My only suggestion, and it is very minor, would be to change the working in your first case study, only slightly. Where it says "Whilst they were on the holiday, Lucy...". Simply state "whilst on holiday, Lucy...". It isn't much of a change, but admittedly it did read a little awkward to me. I enjoy the layout of your chapter, it is very neatly presented. I hope you do well in the final mark. --KBPrimrose (discusscontribs) 08:20, 17 October 2019 (UTC)Reply


Chapter review and feedback

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This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via UCLearn Canvas, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

 

Overall

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  1. Overall, this is an excellent chapter that successfully uses psychological theory and research to help address a practical, real-world phenomenon or problem.
  2. Excellent Overview. The case study doesn't seem to illustrate mother-child talk though?
  3. For additional feedback, see comments below and these copyedits.
  1. Relevant theories are well selected, described, and explained.
  1. Relevant research is well reviewed and discussed in relation to theory.
  1. Written expression
    1. Overall, the chapter is very well written.
  2. Layout
    1. The chapter is well structured, with major sections using sub-sections.
  3. Learning features
    1. Excellent use of interwiki links and embedded links to related book chapters.
    2. Embedding interwiki links links to related book chapters would help to integrate this chapter into the broader book project.
    3. Excellent use of images.
    4. No use of tables.
    5. Basic use of feature boxes.
    6. Excellent use of quizzes.
    7. Basic of case studies.
  4. Grammar
    1. Check and correct use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's).
  5. Proofreading is excellent.
  6. APA style is excellent.
    1. References - add spaces between author initials.
  1. ~7 logged, very substantial, useful, social contributions with direct links to evidence

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 23:36, 5 November 2019 (UTC)Reply


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Canvas site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

 

Overall

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  1. Overall, this is a very good presentation.
  2. This presentation makes effective use of simple tools.
  3. The presentation is over the maximum time limit - content beyond 3 mins is ignored for marking purposes.
  1. Well selected content.
  2. The presentation is well structured.
  3. A Conclusion slide is presented with a take-home message(s).
  1. The presentation is fun, easy to follow, and interesting to watch and listen to.
  2. The presentation makes effective use of text and image based slides with narrated audio.
  3. Well paced. Excellent pauses between sentences. This helps the viewer to cognitively digest the information that has just been presented before moving on to the next point.
  4. Consider slowing down and leaving longer pauses between sentences. This can help the viewer to cognitively digest the information that has just been presented before moving on to the next point.
  5. The font size should be larger to make it easier to read.
  6. The visual communication is effectively supplemented by images.
  1. The chapter title and sub-title are used in the video title - this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  2. The chapter title and sub-title are used on the opening slide - this helps to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  3. Audio recording quality was very good.
  4. Video recording quality was very good
  5. Image sources and their copyright status are stated in general, but the license for each image should be indicated along with the exact source URL.
  6. A copyright license for the presentation is provided in the video description but not in the meta-data.
  7. A link to the book chapter is provided.
  8. A link from the book chapter is provided.
  9. A written description of the presentation is provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 02:17, 18 November 2019 (UTC)Reply

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