Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2018/Veteran transition to civilian life

Comments

Hi Attapattu, here are a couple of good links to get you started for this book chapter. https://www-ncbi-nlm-nih-gov.ezproxy.canberra.edu.au/pmc/articles/PMC4391444/ - This one talks about Canadian veterans returning back to civilian life and the effect of their service on their ability to return. https://www-tandfonline-com.ezproxy.canberra.edu.au/doi/full/10.1080/10550887.2017.1366735?scroll=top&needAccess=true - This talks about the dependence of substances on soldiers current and former (could make a poor health impact on their lives?). You can also look a the mental impact of their service, such as potential PTSD and depression that could have been caused. Hopefully this helps a little bit! --U3158984 (discuss • contribs) 21:46, 1 September 2018 (UTC)

u3144461: Assuming that you're going to look quickly at how certain challenges including PTSD symptoms are being helped post service, you may want to mention how technology plays a role in that with many PTSD apps being created and aimed at ex and current military members so they can reduce symptoms wherever they go given they have a smartphone or tablet.

Hopefully you are finding some information out there on this topic, there is a selection of TED talks that will help you with a scope of issues that veterans face coming back into the civilian life. https://www.ted.com/playlists/549/what_comes_after_war - talks ranging from how the way talking to vets can affect them, or even the fact that they our society is not as welcoming as it should be for soldiers to home back after war. Hopefully this helps! --U3158984 (discuss • contribs) 04:22, 3 October 2018 (UTC)

Topic development feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks are available via UCLearn. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

Title, sub-title, TOC Correct User page User account doesn't appear to have been created No content appears on user page Social contribution No contributions are summarised on the user page Section headings Some suggested main content headings were provided in UCLearn Canvas - I've copied these into the target Wikiversity page I've also added the standard suggested sections (Overview, Conclusion, See also, References, and External links). Some other template headings as included as examples (e.g., Images and Tables - you should remove these, they are just there to help guide initial topic development) Key points An Overview is provided Key points per section were not provided There is no evidence of any awareness of any relevant academic, peer-reviewed research or theory literature on the topic - e.g., consider reviewing Military Transition Theory Image None included References None included Resources None included

General comment: Note that it appears that module 1 for Motivation and Emotion may not have been completed in terms of how to register, edit, and use Wikiversity, and how to prepare the topic development component of the book chapter exercise. I recommend viewing the recordings of Lecture 01, Lecture 02, and Tutorial 01 to help in this respect. -- Jtneill - Talk - c 21:05, 23 September 2018 (UTC)

Heading casing

FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings (or sentence casing). For example, use: ==Cats and dogs== rather than ==Cats and Dogs== -- Jtneill - Talk - c 23:13, 28 November 2018 (UTC)

Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall Overall, this is a promising, sufficient chapter. This chapter is well over the maximum word count. For additional feedback, see comments below and these copyedits. Theory The first sentence is problematic - many contemporary veterans serve without being involved in battlefield action. This is illustrative of other questionable statements contained in the chapter. Militant is very different to military - check definitions. A broad transition theory is used to structure the chapter. It is surprising, however, that Military Transition Theory (Castro et al., 2015) is not used - this is a significant oversight/limitation. Basic but sufficient coverage of theory involving the relation between the target constructs is provided. Research Many statements are unreferenced (e.g., see the tags). Some relevant research is reviewed and discussed in relation to theory but there is a lack of detail. When describing important research findings, consider including a bit more detail about the methodology and indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship. Greater emphasis on major reviews and meta-analyses would be helpful. Written expression Written expression The quality of written expression is problematic. Avoid exaggerating (e.g., the chapter contains some false absolute statements such as: "achievement in the battlefield cannot earn them a job at Microsoft"; another example, rather than "immensely crucial", "crucial" would be sufficient). Some paragraphs are overly long. Each paragraph should communicate one key idea in three to five sentences. Layout See earlier comments about heading casing. Avoid having sections with only one sub-section. Learning features Adding interwiki links for the first mention of key words would make the text more interactive. Basic use of images. No use of tables. No use of feature boxes. Basic use of quizzes. The quiz questions tend to focus on trivia (e.g,. statistics), rather than conceptual understanding or take-home messages. Limited use of case studies or examples. Spelling, grammar, and proofreading. More proofreading is needed to fix typos and bring the quality of written expression closer to a professional standard. Check and make correct use of commas. Use serial commas. Spelling can be improved (e.g., see the tags). Use Australian spelling (e.g., hypothesize vs. hypothesise; behavior vs. behaviour). The grammar for some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the tags). APA style Use APA style for Figure captions. Refer to each Table and each Figure at least once within the main text. Provide more detailed Figure captions to help connect the figure to the text. Citations Use ampersand (&) inside brackets and "and" outside brackets. References are not in full APA style e.g., Check and make correct use of capitalisation. Check and make correct use of italicisation. See new doi format.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 23:13, 28 November 2018 (UTC)

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Canvas site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall Overall, this is a basic, but sufficient presentation. Structure and content Many of the comments about the book chapter also apply to this section. Coverage of theory is OK. Lack of coverage of research. No use of examples. What are the take-home messages? Communication The presentation makes basic use of Powtoon. There are spelling errors (e.g., "veteranans"). Production quality Use the full chapter title and sub-title on the opening slide and in the name of the video because this helps to match the book chapter and to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. Video recording quality is good. Audio communication is problematic - the combination of loud music/strong accent makes the narration difficult to follow and understand. Consider muting the music during narration to help the viewer concentrate on the combination of visual information and narrated audio. A copyright license for the presentation is not provided. A link to the book chapter is not provided. No written description of the presentation is provided.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 23:20, 28 November 2018 (UTC)