Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2017/Sadness as the longest lasting emotion

Latest comment: 6 years ago by Jtneill in topic Heading casing


Topic development review and feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks will be available later via Moodle. Keep an eye on Announcements. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

 

Title, sub-title, TOC

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  1. Excellent

User page

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  1. Created, minimal

Social contribution

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  1. None summarised with links to evidence

Section headings

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  1. In general, a good-looking 2-level heading structure, however I don't see any headings which are directly relevant to addressing the central question about the length of sadness compared to other emotions?
  2. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an overview paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.
  3. What are the main theories being used to help address the question?
  4. What is the main research evidence?

Key points

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  1. Limited development
  2. Key points not developed for all sections
  3. Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles.
  4. Consider including more examples/case studies

Image

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  1. Excellent

References

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  1. Only one references provided, suggesting that only a limited understanding of relevant literature has been developed to date.
    1. Use the new recommended format for dois - http://blog.apastyle.org/apastyle/2014/07/how-to-use-the-new-doi-format-in-apa-style.html

Resources

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  1. None provided

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 06:14, 16 October 2017 (UTC)Reply


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

 

Overall

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  1. Overall, this is a solid presentation
  1. Excellent content in terms of addressing the topic with theory and research
  2. Take-home messages? (conclusion)
  1. Consider being more selective about what to present so that the audio narration can be slowed down
  2. Basic, but effective use of animation, combination of text and image
  1. Audio and video recording quality is clear
  2. Mute background music because it makes it more difficult to concentrate on the audio narration
  3. Use longer pauses between slides
  4. Minimal use of description of the presentation, acknowledgements etc.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 22:14, 24 November 2017 (UTC)Reply

Heading casing

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FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 04:51, 4 December 2017 (UTC)Reply


Chapter review and feedback

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This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

 

Overall

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  1. Overall, this is a problematic chapter because it only loosely addresses the specific topic. Much of the content would belong better in more general chapter about sadness, rather than in a chapter specifically focused on summarising the best available psychological theory and research about why sadness is the longest lasting emotion.
  2. For additional feedback, see these copyedits.
  1. This chapter contains too much general theoretical material about sadness. Instead, summarise and link to further information (e.g., Sadness (Book chapter, 2013), to allow this chapter to focus on the specific topic (i.e., why is sadness the longest lasting emotion).
  2. The Case Study was probably more appropriate for a chapter about grief. What exactly does this case study show about the sadness being longer lasting compared to other emotions? Explain.
  1. Many of the comments about the theory section also apply to research.
  2. Some statements were unreferenced - see the [factual?] tags.
  3. Table 1 is very helpful. Source? Expand description - this information, and the reasons why, are highly relevant to the targeted topic. Ideally, build the chapter around this Table and related theory and research.
  4. When describing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
  5. Greater emphasis on major reviews and meta-analyses would be helpful.
  1. Written expression
    1. Avoid excessive use of 1st person perspective and future tense (e.g., instead of "In this chapter, we will discuss..." -> be more direct, in third persona and present tense "This chapter discusses...")
    2. Abbreviations (such as e.g., i.e.., etc.) should only be used inside parentheses.
    3. Avoid directional referencing e.g., "As previously mentioned"
  2. Layout
    1. See earlier comments about heading casing
    2. Sections which include sub-sections should also include an introductory paragraph (which doesn't need a separate heading) before branching into the sub-headings.
  3. Learning features
    1. Use in-text interwiki links, rather than external links.
  4. Spelling, grammar, and proofreading
    1. The grammar for some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags).
    2. Spelling can be improved (e.g., see the [spelling?] tags).
    3. Use Australian spelling (e.g., hypothesize vs. hypothesise; behavior vs. behaviour).
    4. Check and correct overcapitalisation (e.g., Western Society -> Western society).
  5. APA style
    1. Direct quotes need page numbers.
    2. Use APA style for Table captions.
    3. Citations
      1. Check and correct use of citations for sources with six or more authors.
      2. Do not use a comma before et al.
    4. References are not in full APA style e.g.,
      1. Volume numbers are missing for some references.
      2. Do not include issue numbers for journals which are continuously numbered within volumes.
      3. See new doi format

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