Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2017/Orgasm health benefits

Latest comment: 6 years ago by Jtneill in topic Multimedia feedback

Articles edit

Hi,

I'm doing my book chapter on orgasm neurology and have come across these articles that I think might also be helpful to you.

1. Colson, M. H. (2010). ‘Female orgasm: Myths, facts and controversies’. Sexologies, 19(1), 8-14. http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S115813600900173X This one specifically looks at women but it does look at various aspects of female orgasms and not just the biological side.

2. Georgiadis, J. R. (2011). ‘Exposing orgasm in the brain: A critical eye’. Sexual and Relationship Therapy, 26(4), http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/14681994.2011.647904?scroll=top&needAccess=true This is a review of a lot of the research that has been done on the structures of the brain that are involved in orgasms, as well as some of the hormones etc. It has been very useful to me and I saw that one of your sections was on the neurology of orgasms so I thought it might be helpful as a starting point for you.

U3115549 (discusscontribs) 08:37, 31 August 2017 (UTC)U3115549Reply

Heading casing edit

 
FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 01:17, 1 September 2017 (UTC)Reply


Topic development review and feedback

The topic development has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Topic development marks will be available later via Moodle. Keep an eye on Announcements. Note that marks are based on what was available before the due date, whereas the comments may also be based on all material available at time of providing this feedback.

 

Title, sub-title, TOC edit

  1. Only title provided - template added for sub-title and adjust casing

User page edit

  1. Created, minimalistic

Social contribution edit

  1. None summarised with links to evidence

Section headings edit

  1. Basic heading development would benefit from further development, perhaps using a 2-level structure for each major section.
  2. Consider including example/case study earlier e.g., in the Overview to help engage reader interest
  3. In the Overview, introduce the major theoretical perspectives
  4. In the Conclusion, emphasise the practical, theory/research based suggestions for a health life
  5. Future research probably doesn't need a stand-alone section - could be incorporated into other sections

Key points edit

  1. Basic key points are provided for most sections.
  2. Include in-text interwiki links for the first mention of key terms to relevant Wikipedia articles.
  3. Consider including more examples/case studies.
  4. Consider embedding one quiz question per major section rather than having one longer quiz towards the end.

Image edit

  1. One image embedded
  2. Consider increasing image size from default
  3. Consider enhancing figure captions to help connect the image more strongly to key points being made in the text - perhaps include the citation for this image

References edit

  1. Good.
  2. For full APA style:
    1. Use correct capitalisation e.g., for journal title
    2. Use correct italicisation
    3. Use the new recommended format for dois - http://blog.apastyle.org/apastyle/2014/07/how-to-use-the-new-doi-format-in-apa-style.html
    4. Do not include issue numbers for journals which are continuously numbered within a volume

Resources edit

  1. See also
    1. Very good
  2. External links
    1. None provided

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 22:22, 17 October 2017 (UTC)Reply


Chapter review and feedback edit

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

 

Overall edit

  1. Overall, this is a short, but well-focused chapter.
  2. For additional feedback, see these copyedits.

Theory edit

  1. Theories are well described and explained.
  2. Consider providing more practical, take-home messages - e.g., what is the optimal "orgasm prescription"?

Research edit

  1. Good coverage of relevant research.
  2. When describing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
  3. Greater emphasis on major reviews and meta-analyses would be helpful.

Written expression edit

  1. Written expression
    1. Some paragraphs are overly long. Each paragraph should communicate one key idea in three to five sentences.
  2. Layout
    1. See earlier comments about heading casing.
    2. The chapter was well structured.
  3. Learning features
    1. Interwiki links are well used; more could be added.
    2. Minimal use of images.
    3. No use of tables.
    4. Basic use of quizzes.
    5. No use of case studies.
  4. Spelling, grammar, and proofreading.
    1. Use Australian spelling (e.g., hypothesize vs. hypothesise; behavior vs. behaviour).
    2. Check and correct over-capitalisation.
    3. The grammar for some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags).
  5. APA style
    1. Citations
      1. A comma is needed before "&" for citations involving three or more authors.
      2. Use ampersand (&) inside brackets and "and" outside brackets.
    2. References are not in full APA style e.g.,
      1. Check and correct italicisation.
      2. See new doi format.
      3. Do not include issue numbers for journals which are continuously numbered within volumes.


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

 

Overall edit

  1. Overall, this is an excellent presentation.

Structure and content edit

  1. Well selected and structured content.
  2. Narrate the full title, to help the viewer understanding the focus and goal of the presentation.

Communication edit

  1. The presentation is easy to follow and interesting to watch and listen to.
  2. Consider presenting less text per slide - it is hard to take in the audio narration and read a lot of text.
  3. Consider leaving longer pauses between sentences. This can help the viewer to cognitively digest the information that has just been presented before moving on to the next point.

Production quality edit

  1. Use the full chapter title and sub-title on the opening slide and in the name of the video because this helps to match the book chapter and to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation.
  2. Audio and video recording quality was excellent.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 12:29, 4 December 2017 (UTC)Reply

Return to "Motivation and emotion/Book/2017/Orgasm health benefits" page.