Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2017/Optimal innovation and pleasure

Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall Overall, this is a poorly written, unfocused, underdeveloped chapter. Some sections appear to be plagiarised. For additional feedback, see these copyedits. Theory The problem and theory are not clearly explained. The chapter uses overly technical jargon and is not sufficiently well explained for a lay audience. More examples would be helpful. There is a lack of integration between the discussion of innovation and pleasure. Research The review of research lacks integration with theory. When describing important research findings, consider reporting the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship. Some statements were unreferenced - see the tags Written expression Written expression This chapter is poorly written. Professional assistance is strongly recommended to help support in structuring the chapter, using APA style, and in producing higher quality of written English. Add an Overview - the problem and concepts are insufficiently introduced. Some paragraphs were overly long. Each paragraph should communicate one key idea in three to five sentences. The chapter could have benefited from a more developed Overview and Conclusion, with clearer focus question(s) (Overview) and take-home self-help message for each focus question (Conclusion). Obtaining (earlier) comments on a chapter plan and/or chapter draft could have helped to improve the chapter. Learning features Adding interwiki links would make the text more interactive. Some use of images. Limited use of tables, quizzes, case studies etc. Spelling, grammar and proofreading More proofreading is needed for this text to be of a professional standard. The grammar for many sentences is incorrect. For example, see the tags Use Australian spelling e.g., hypothesize -> hypothesise Some words have been unnecessarily capitalised. In other places, there is a lack of necessary capitalisation (e.g., at the start of sentences). Similar, there are unnecessary spaces used in some places and a lack of necessary spaces in other places. APA style Use APA style for Figure captions. Provide more detailed Figure captions that more clearly relate to the image to the text. Citations Check and correct use of APA style for citations. References are not in full APA style e.g., Check and correct italicisation See new doi format Do not include issue numbers for journals which are continuously numbered within volumes.

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall Overall, this is a basic, but sufficient presentation. Structure and content Many of the comments about the book chapter also apply to this section. Too much content (the presentation goes over the 3 min. time limit) - be more selective. Content beyond 3 minutes is ignored for marking purposes. The presentation is theory-heavy - consider summarising theory more simply and using more examples to illustrate concepts. Add and narrate a Title slide, to help the viewer understanding the focus and goal of the presentation. Add and narrate an Overview slide, to help orientate the viewer about what will be covered. The presentation could be strengthened by adding a Conclusion slide with practical, take-home messages. Communication The presentation is quite technical and hard to follow. The audio narration is well placed, but too much content is covered. The visual communication largely consists of text-based slides. Production quality The presentation is over the maximum time limit. Use the full chapter title and sub-title on the opening slide and in the name of the video because this helps to match the book chapter and to clearly convey the purpose of the presentation. No link was provided from the book chapter to the presentation - has now been added. No link was provided from the presentation to the book chapter. No description is provided. Consider categorising the presentation as Education.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 12:21, 5 December 2017 (UTC)