Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2016/Extreme sport motivation

Latest comment: 7 years ago by Jtneill in topic Multimedia feedback

Comments edit

Hi there, this definitely is an interesting topic and is linked with mine in external links. I think you should add some information about daredevils, like crusty demons, the dirt bike riders who made high risk jumps while performing stunts and using various other objects, or go into the history of the days of Evil Canival (one of the early daredevils). You could also talk about intrinsic motivation, the reason someone may take part in extreme sports is because not many people do engage in these sports and to be one of the very few that has done it. Also what the role of adrenaline has in extreme sports in the sense of does it make people nervous and anticipate what will happen during the event and the feelings after they have accomoplished it. Keep up the good work be interested to read it once it is completed. U3121724 (discusscontribs) 11:19, 20 October 2016 (UTC)Reply

Hi there, this definitely could be an interesting read. Physiological factors may also be something you might like to consider adding to this topic, such as release of epinephrine and why that may motivate people.Hope that helps :) HomerIncognito (discusscontribs) 06:31, 13 September 2016 (UTC)Reply

Hi, this is a really interesting topic. I would interested to read something about if personality types play a role in whether certain people are more likely to engage in extreme sports. Hope that helps. Good luck! can't wait to read your chapter. --U3115468 (discusscontribs) 03:23, 14 September 2016 (UTC)Reply

Hi, I found two full-text articles for you about the positive psychological effects of extreme sports. The articles are both studies using fairly small groups - I suppose since there aren't huge numbers of undergrad psych students involved in extreme sport :P - but found interesting themes about the constructive effects of extreme sports in the lives of those who do it. Here are both urls: http://hpq.sagepub.com.ezproxy.canberra.edu.au/content/18/4/477 http://jhp.sagepub.com.ezproxy.canberra.edu.au/content/49/1/114

Good luck :)--U3083662 (discusscontribs) 08:55, 28 September 2016 (UTC)Reply

Great topic! This is a great article published by two Australian Sports Psychologists. Hope it is benefical, look forward to seeing the end result. http://eprints.qut.edu.au/62296/1/The_Search_for_Freedom_in_Extreme_Sportsin.pdf--U3090066 (discusscontribs) 20:24, 8 October 2016 (UTC)Reply

Hi! I added a template to your overview section to create an inviting first paragraph. Hope this is okay. You can change the colour by going edit and changing the theme number anywhere from 1-4. Good luck with the rest of your chapter!U3115468 (discusscontribs) 05:00, 9 October 2016 (UTC)Reply

Heading formatting edit

Just use the standard formatting for headings (e.g., no bold), to help ensure consistency across the chapters. -- Jtneill - Talk - c 12:51, 15 September 2016 (UTC)Reply

Correct labelling of figures edit

Hi, I noticed that some of your pictures don't have the correct labelling. Just in case you missed it, it starts with Figure 1. and continues from there. Hope this is helpful!--Jbboys (discusscontribs) 09:31, 20 October 2016 (UTC)Reply

Structure edit

Avoid sections with only sub-section; either add another sub-section or merge the content into the higher-level section. -- Jtneill - Talk - c 22:08, 21 October 2016 (UTC)Reply

References edit

Remove numbering of references. Also note that generally issue numbers shouldn't be included - http://blog.apastyle.org/apastyle/2011/10/how-to-determine-whether-a-periodical-is-paginated-by-issue.html -- Jtneill - Talk - c 22:08, 21 October 2016 (UTC)Reply

Comments edit

Hi, I was very interested in your topic so I thought I would give it a read. I am very impressed, it was really interesting. I took the liberality of removing those number references for you which Neill refereed to. I hope you weren't using them for anything and sorry if you were. I also made some APA changes to your reference list :) - u3119387 23/10/16


Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

 

Overall edit

  1. The chapter is over the maximum word-count.
  2. Overall, this chapter has good content, but could be improved by better organisation, selection, and synthesisation of theory, better integration of critical research review, and better implementation of APA style.
  3. For more feedback see these copyedits and the comments below.
  4. Feel free to make ongoing changes to the chapter if you wish to address any of these comments or make other improvements.

Theory edit

  1. Engaging Overview - perhaps it could be improved by outlining the major theories/research - or stating the chapter's focus questions - or explaining what will be covered.
  2. A wide range of theory is covered, but it is a bit of a jumbled smorgasboard.
  3. Some theories are covered in the context of relevant research, others not.
  4. Perhaps the chapter could be improved by ensuing greater integration between theory and research (e.g., discard theories without accompanying research). It could also make sense to group related theories into sequential order e.g., genetics and personality.
  5. The Conclusion is weak; offers a succint summary and emphasise take-away messages that relate to the book theme.
  6. Several helpful examples or case studies were provided.

Research edit

  1. Some statements were unreferenced (e.g., see the [factual?] tags)
  2. When discussing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.

Written expression edit

  1. Written expression
    1. Some clarification templates have been added to the page.
    2. Some paragraphs are overly long. Paragraphs should communicate a single key idea, often in three to five sentences.
  2. Structure and headings
    1. Avoid sections with only one sub-section. A section should have no sub-sections or at least two sub-sections.
    2. Some of the content was restructured in an attempt to improve the flow.
  3. Layout
    1. Figures and bullet-points are used effectively.
  4. Integration with other chapters
    1. Little integration with other chapters is evident.
    2. Add interwiki links links to a wider range of other relevant chapters.
  5. Learning features
    1. Some links to Wikipedia and/or Wikiversity articles were added as external links - these should be changed to interwiki links.
    2. Quiz questions could be used to encourage reader engagement.
  6. Spelling
    1. Use Australian spelling (some general examples are hypothesize -> hypothesise; behavior -> behaviour).
    2. Spelling could be improved - see the [spelling?] tags.
  7. Grammar and proofreading
    1. Check and correct the use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's vs. individuals').
    2. Check and correct the use of abbreviations (such as "e.g.," and "i.e.,").
  8. APA style
    1. Check and correct the APA style formatting of in-text citations.
    2. Check and correct the APA style for how to report numbers (Numbers under 10 should be written in words (e.g., five); numbers 10 and over should be written in numbers (e.g., 10)).
    3. Direct quotes need page numbers.
    4. The reference list is not in full APA style.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 07:27, 13 November 2016 (UTC)Reply


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

 

Overall edit

  1. Overall, this is a basic, but sufficient presentation.
  2. Overall, this is a solid presentation.
  3. Overall, this is a well prepared and executed presentation.
  4. Overall, this is a very well prepared and executed presentation.
  5. Overall, this is an excellent all-round presentation.

Structure and content edit

  1. Overview
    1. Too brief/limited.
    2. Add a dedicated slide.
    3. Use the Overview to set up the problem to be solved (the question i.e., the subtitle for the book chapter).
    4. Tell the listener what they will find out about if they watch this presentation.
    5. Examples could be helpful.
  2. Selection and organisation
    1. Basic coverage of theory and research.
    2. Theory was well covered - except the topic is extreme sport motivation - which aspects of sensation seeking are most related to extreme motivation?
    3. Research was not well covered - e.g., what is the single most important research study on this topic?
    4. Include more key citations and list references.
  3. Conclusion
    1. The Conclusion slide(s) could summarise the take-home messages in more detail - e.g., how can these ideas improve our everyday lives?

Communication edit

  1. Audio
    1. Audio is clear and well-paced.
  2. Image/Video
    1. Increase font size to make text easier to read; reduce the amount of text.
    2. Several images included; possibly incorporate more images, diagrams, tables etc.

Production quality edit

  1. Overall, basic Prezi production.
  2. Meta-data
    1. Rename the title so that it includes the subtitle (and matches the book chapter).
    2. Add a link to the book chapter.
    3. Link to chapter not provided.
    4. Use the Description field to provide a link to the chapter.
    5. Fill out the description field (e.g., brief description of presentation, link back to the book chapter, license details, and possibly include references, image attributions, and/or transcript).
  3. Audio recording quality
    1. Reasonably good - a little metallic/roboty
    2. Audio volume varies somewhat between slides.
  4. Image/video recording quality
    1. Zoom in closer on the slides
    2. Sufficient
  5. Licensing
    1. A copyright license for the presentation is not indicated (i.e., in the meta-data or the visual presentation).
    2. The copyright licenses and sources of the images used are not indicated - there may have been copyright violation unless you own the copyright to the images used.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 08:12, 21 November 2016 (UTC)Reply

Return to "Motivation and emotion/Book/2016/Extreme sport motivation" page.