Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2016/Delayed reinforcement and motivation

Latest comment: 7 years ago by Jtneill in topic Multimedia feedback

interesting topic edit

hello there, interesting topic. I just did some gramma fix, hope you won't mind. Hope I can see more after you finish. Good luck--U3121927 (discusscontribs) 11:29, 18 October 2016 (UTC)Reply

Feedback edit

Hi! I know you seem to be early on in the process, but I suggest adding some images , or putting a coloured box around your example problem (see here). Also, I would make the Self-Determination Theory and Cognitive Evaluation theories sections have larger headings, as they are important to your topic. Good luck!

Cora --Cora.boyle (discusscontribs) 08:18, 20 October 2016 (UTC)Reply

Heading casing edit

 
FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 21:55, 21 October 2016 (UTC)Reply


Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

 

Overall edit

  1. This is a problematic chapter primarily because:
    1. it doesn't satisfactory summarise the delayed reinforcement/gratification theoretical and research literature and provide science-based take-home messages for improving readers' everyday lives
    2. the quality of written expression is not of professional standard
  2. For more feedback see these copyedits and the comments below.
  3. Feel free to make ongoing changes to the chapter if you wish to address any of these comments or make other improvements.

Theory edit

  1. Overall, despite the obvious effort, this chapter doesn't really come to grips with the motivational implications of delayed reinforcement in a way that satisfies the book theme.
  2. Overview: Make it more clear how the scenario illustrates key points about delayed reinforcement.
  3. Is delayed reinforcement the same as delayed gratification? What about delay discounting? (The chapter could be improved by demonstrates a broader and deeper theoretical understanding of the central concepts.). Here's a suggested start for relevant peer reviewed literature: https://scholar.google.com.au/scholar?q=delayed+gratification+reinforcement+discounting
  4. The Conclusion is weak; offer a succint summary of key points and emphasise take-away messages that relate to the book theme.

Research edit

  1. The best research literature about this topic isn't currently reviewed in this chapter (e.g., consider discussing the Stanford marshmallow experiment.
  2. Some statements are unreferenced (e.g., see the [factual?] tags)
  3. When describing important research studies, provide some indication of the nature of the method.
  4. When discussing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.

Written expression edit

  1. Written expression is not yet up to professional standard mainly due to grammatical errors.
    1. Some sentences are overly long (e.g., the last sentence of the Overview)
  2. Structure and headings
    1. Each section should start with at least one introductory paragraph before branching into sub-sections.
    2. See earlier comments about heading casing
  3. Layout
    1. No images or tables were used.  
    2. Add bullet-points for See also and External links.
  4. Integration with other chapters
    1. Some integration with other chapters is evident.
  5. Learning features
    1. Some links to Wikipedia and/or Wikiversity articles were added as external links - these should be changed to interwiki links.
    2. Quiz questions could be used to encourage reader engagement.
    3. Add more Interwiki links (to relevant Wikipedia articles) to make the text more interactive.
  6. Spelling
    1. Use Australian spelling (some general examples are hypothesize -> hypothesise; behavior -> behaviour).
    2. Spelling could be improved - see the [spelling?] tags.
  7. Grammar and proofreading
    1. The grammar of many sentences needs to be improved for the written expression to be of professional standard (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags).
    2. Check and correct the use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's vs. individuals').
  8. APA style
    1. The reference list is not in full APA style.
    2. subjects -> participants
    3. Check and correct the APA style formatting of in-text citations.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 08:14, 18 November 2016 (UTC)Reply


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

 

Overall edit

  1. Overall, this is a basic, but sufficient presentation.

Structure and content edit

  1. Overview
    1. Add a title slide
    2. Engaging opening example
    3. Use the Overview to set up the problem to be solved (the question i.e., the subtitle for the book chapter).
    4. Tell the listener what they will find out about if they watch this presentation.
    5. Add an Overview slide.
  2. Selection and organisation
    1. Well selected content - not too much or too little.
    2. Theory rich; research poor.
    3. Addresses a self-help theme.
    4. Citations and references are included.
  3. Conclusion
    1. Take-home messages / key points are summarised.

Communication edit

  1. Audio
    1. Reasonably well narrated.
    2. Some pauses/stumbles and grammatical errors.
    3. Audio is reasonably clear and well-paced.
    4. Consider using greater intonation to enhance engagement.[1]
    5. Some words could be more clearly pronounced.
  2. Visuals
    1. Basic - approximately half a dozen text-based slides with some images.
    2. Visuals are clear and easy to read.
    3. The combination of images and text is effective.

Production quality edit

  1. Overall, basic production.
  2. Meta-data
    1. Not submitted via Moodle
    2. Rename the title so that it includes the subtitle (and matches the book chapter).
    3. Add a clickable link to the book chapter - this would be easier if the presentation was published to YouTube. Then the presentation could also use the description field (e.g., brief description of presentation, link back to the book chapter, license details, and possibly include references, image attributions, and/or transcript).
  3. Audio recording quality
    1. OK, but editing between slides is a bit choppy.
  4. Image/video recording quality
    1. Effective use of simple tools.
  5. Licensing
    1. A copyright license for the presentation is not indicated (i.e., in the meta-data or the visual presentation).
    2. The copyright licenses and sources of the images used are not indicated - there may have been copyright violation unless you own the copyright to the images used.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 05:05, 23 November 2016 (UTC)Reply

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