Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2016/Delay discounting and emotion

Heading casing

FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use: ==Cats and dogs== rather than ==Cats and Dogs== -- Jtneill - Talk - c 08:32, 27 November 2016 (UTC)

Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall Overall, this is a promising chapter that could be improved by focusing more of the chapter on the core question, proofreading, spelling and grammar, and making greater use of the features of the Wikiversity editing environment. For more feedback see these copyedits and the comments below. Feel free to make ongoing changes to the chapter if you wish to address any of these comments or make other improvements. Theory Abbreviate the general theoretical material about behaviourism and provide references and links to further information. This would allow more space to focus on the theories directly related to the specific topic in more detail. Out of a 4,000 word chapter, there are less than 500 words (in the section "The Role of Emotions on Delay Discounting") that directly address the purpose of the chapter. The single most important statement in this section is "This finding is important as it leads to the exploration of emotion as a possible inhibiter [sic] or promoter of delay discounting." - expansion of this statement would be the key way to improve this chapter. The different types of delay discounting models are reasonably well explained. More examples would be helpful. Figures depicting the different types of delay discounting decay curves would be helpful. The Conclusion offer a simple, but good summary of the basic relationship between emotion and delay discounting. The Conclusion could be improved by providing some more concrete, take-home messages. Research Some relevant research is cited - the chapter could be improved by discussing more research about emotion and delay discounting. From a chronological point of view, it would make more sense to discuss Classical Conditioning first, and then Operant Conditioning. Was the Pavlov (1897) source directly consulted? If not, don't cite it (or use a secondary citation). The Weiten (2013) textbook is over-used as a citation; preferably consult and cite primary, peer-reviewed sources. When describing important research studies, provide some indication of the nature of the method. When discussing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship. Written expression The chapter somewhat addresses the topic and book theme but lacks practical take-home messages. Some clarification templates have been added to the page. Obtaining (earlier) comments on a chapter plan and/or chapter draft could have helped to improve the chapter. Structure and headings See earlier comments about heading casing Each section should start with at least one introductory paragraph before branching into sub-sections. Layout No images or tables were used. Integration with other chapters Limited integration with other chapters is evident. For example, Performance enhancing drug usage motivation in elite athletes could be mentioned in the text as a real life dilemma/example of delay discounting. Learning features Add Interwiki links (to relevant Wikipedia articles) to make the text more interactive (e.g., Temporal discounting has now been added to See also - but also provide links for the first mention of key words. A quiz question is provided - more could be added to encourage reader engagement. Spelling Spelling could be improved - see the tags. Grammar and proofreading Check and correct use of commas (e.g., "For example" -> "For example, ") The grammar of some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the tags). APA style Check and correct the use of "&" vs. "and" (Use ampersand (&) inside brackets and "and" outside brackets). Check and correct the use of APA style for direct quotes. The reference list is not in full APA style.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 08:32, 27 November 2016 (UTC)

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall Overall, this is a basic, but sufficient presentation. Ideally, use more examples. Graphs/Figures would be helpful. Less focus on background behaviourism theory and more focus on theory/research directly related to emotion and DD would improve the presentation. Structure and content Overview Too brief - explain the problem in simple, easy to understand language, with an example. Use the Overview to set up the problem to be solved (the question i.e., the subtitle for the book chapter). Selection and organisation Probably too much content is presented - be more selective - e.g., work backwards from 3 take-home messages to work out what content needs to be presented - and then focus on only that which is essential to conveying these messages. Overly heavy coverage of theory. Basic coverage of research. Doesn't clearly address a self-help theme. Citations are included; add references. Conclusion None provided. Communication Audio Audio narration is reasonable but could be improved by slowing down and being more selective about key content to present. See this article for more information about speaking rates. Leave longer pauses between sentences. Consider using greater intonation to enhance engagement.[1] Visuals Basic - approximately half a dozen text-based slides with some images. Increase font size to make text easier to read; reduce the amount of text. Consider using more slides with less text and larger font on each slide. Consider including more images, figures, and/or tables. Production quality Overall, basic production. Meta-data The title in the presentation differs from the title in the meta-data and this differs from the title and subtitle of the chapter. Rename the title so that it includes the subtitle (and matches the book chapter). Link to the book chapter provided. Fill out the description field (e.g., brief description of presentation, link back to the book chapter, license details, and possibly include references, image attributions, and/or transcript). Audio recording quality OK - a bit echoey. Keyboard clicks audible - consider using an external microphone to improve audio recording quality. Consider using an external microphone to improve audio recording quality. Image/video recording quality Effective use of simple tools. Licensing A copyright license for the presentation is correctly shown in at least one location. Creative Commons.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 08:44, 27 November 2016 (UTC)