Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2015/Nicotine and addiction

Latest comment: 8 years ago by Jtneill in topic Multimedia feedback

Heading casing

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FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 02:17, 1 December 2015 (UTC)Reply


Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

 

Overall

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  1. Overall, this is a solid chapter.
  2. For more feedback see these copyedits and the comments below.
  1. A wide range of motivational theory is covered; perhaps too much.
  2. Abbreviate general theoretical material and provide references and links to further information. This would allow more space to apply the theories to the specific topic in more detail.
  3. Addition of case studies or additional examples could be helpful.
  1. Research about nicotine usage rates etc. could be abbreviated, to allow greater focus on research about nicotine addiction and treatment.
  2. Some statements were unreferenced (e.g., see the [factual?] tags)
  3. When describing important research studies, provide some indication of the nature of the sample and possibly cultural context.
  4. When discussing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
  1. Written expression
    1. Some sentences are overly long.
    2. Some paragraphs are overly long. Each paragraph should communicate one key idea in three to five sentences.
    3. Write for an international, not just an Australian, audience. Abbreviate the Australian-specific material.
    4. The quality

of written expression could be improved (e.g., see where clarification templates have been added to the page).

    1. Avoid directional referencing (e.g., above, below, as previously mentioned).
  1. Layout
    1. See earlier comments about heading casing
    2. Figure are used effectively. No Tables are used.
  2. Learning features
    1. Some links to Wikipedia and/or Wikiversity articles were added as external links - these should be changed to interwiki links
    2. Add more Interwiki links (e.g., to relevant Wikipedia articles and other Wikiversity book chapters) to make the text more interactive.
    3. Quiz questions are used effectively to encourage reader engagement.
  3. Spelling
    1. Use Australian spelling (some general examples are hypothesize -> hypothesise; behavior -> behaviour).
  4. Grammar and proofreading
    1. Use abbreviations such as "e.g." inside brackets and "for example" outside brackets.
    2. Check and correct the use of abbreviations (such as "e.g.," and "i.e.,").
    3. The grammar of some sentences could be improved (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags).
  5. APA style
    1. Direct quotes need page numbers.
    2. Check and correct the APA style for how to report numbers (Numbers under 10 should be written in words (e.g., five); numbers 10 and over should be written in numbers (e.g., 10)).
    3. The reference list is not in full APA style.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 02:17, 1 December 2015 (UTC)Reply


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

 

Overall

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  1. Overall, this is a solid presentation.
  1. The Overview sets up the problem to be solved.
  2. The emphasis is practical (good), but there is a lack of overview of theory and research (provide more details) (room for improvement). What is the intervention framework based on?
  3. Is this a self-intervention, or a one-on-one client-led intervention, or a group intervention? (more details?)
  4. A Conclusion slide summarising the take-home messages / key points could be helpful.
  1. Present in the third person (i.e., avoid "I", "my", "we" etc.) because the presentation should be about the topic, not the presenter.
  2. Audio is clear and well-paced.
  3. Visuals are clear and easy to read.
  4. Consider incorporating non-text based visuals to supplement the narration.
  1. Overall, well produced using simple tools.
  2. Rename the title so that it includes the subtitle (and matches the book chapter).
  3. Fill out the description field (e.g., brief description of presentation, link back to the book chapter, license details, and possibly include references, image attributions, and/or audio transcript).
  4. No link is provided back to the book chapter.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 03:34, 3 December 2015 (UTC)Reply

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