Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2015/Antisocial Personality Disorder and emotion

Latest comment: 9 years ago by Jtneill in topic Multimedia feedback

Comments

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Hi there,

I think your chapter is quiet good. I Understand it is still currently a work in progress but I look forward to the addition of interactive materials such as images, hyperlinks etc. I think your current structure is very good and it flows very well currently. I have "starred" the page and will provide more feedback as the content goes up. Good Luck! --202.46.136.191 (discuss) 11:32, 21 October 2015 (UTC)Reply

Heading casing

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FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 04:11, 23 October 2015 (UTC)Reply

Suggestions

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Hello! I think your book chapter topic is very interesting and you write really well too. The points you have made throughout are really concise and you explain terms well. I think you may want to discuss intervention and treatment for antisocial personality disorder. The below links will provide you with more information regarding treatment options. National Collaborating Centre for Mental Health (UK. (2010). INTERVENTIONS FOR PEOPLE WITH ANTISOCIAL PERSONALITY DISORDER AND ASSOCIATED SYMPTOMS AND BEHAVIOURS. British Psychological Society. Gunderson, J. G., & Gabbard, G. O. (Eds.). (2008). Psychotherapy for personality disorders (Vol. 13). American Psychiatric Pub. Moeller, F. G., & Dougherty, D. M. (2001). Antisocial personality disorder, alcohol, and aggression. Alcohol Research and Health, 25(1), 5-11.

Goodluck and I look forward to reading your chapter!

)

--U3034876 (discusscontribs) 08:36, 23 October 2015 (UTC)Reply


Hey girl :) i have just looked at your chapter and it looks so good so far :) i just have one suggestion- which is completely optional. Where you have put some headings and those coloured boxes, i reckon it could be cool to use something like this as it might be a bit more of a statement so the headings dont get lost :) (3083783ro (discusscontribs) 09:24, 24 October 2015 (UTC)=3083783ro)Reply

Title

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Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall

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  1. Overall, this is a solid chapter which could be improved by abbreviating the initial material about APD and expanding on the material about emotion and emotion recognition and APD in order to better address the topic and book theme. For more feedback see these copyedits and the comments below.
  1. Theory about APD is well-covered. Theory about APD and emotion should be expanded.
  2. Abbreviate the general theoretical material and provide references and links to further information. This would allow more space to apply the theories to the specific topic in more detail.
  3. Addition of case studies or additional examples could be helpful.
  1. Sources are well cited.
  2. More detailed review of research about APD and emotion should be provided.
  3. When describing important research studies, provide some indication of the nature of the sample and possibly cultural context.
  4. When discussing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
  1. Written expression is reasonably good, although there is a tendency towards overly long paragraphs.
    1. Be consistent in use of APD abbreviation.
    2. Some paragraphs are overly long. Each paragraph should communicate one key idea in three to five sentences.
  2. Layout
    1. See earlier comments about heading casing.
    2. (Excessive use of) coloured boxes was removed so as to aid accessibilityreadability; strive for simple layout (e.g., as per Wikipedia articles)
    3. Add bullet-points for See also and External links
    4. The chapter is well-structured.
    5. Figures were used effectively.
    6. Some links to Wikipedia and/or Wikiversity articles were added as external links - these should be changed to interwiki links
  3. Spelling, grammar, and proofreading are excellent.
  4. APA style
    1. The reference list is not in full APA style.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 09:37, 22 November 2015 (UTC)Reply


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

Overall

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  1. Overall, this is a solid presentation.
  1. Theory was well covered.
  2. A conclusion slide summarising the take-home messages could be helpful.
  1. Audio is too fast to easily comprehend - consider slowing down.
  2. Consider using greater intonation to enhance engagement.
  3. Consider reducing the amount of text - use bullet points.
  1. Rename the title on slide 1 so that it matches the multimedia and book chapter titles.
  2. Fill out the description field (e.g., brief description of presentation, license details, link back to chapter).
  3. Audio is quiet - review microphone set-up.
  4. The copyright license and source for the images used is not indicated - there may have been copyright violation.
  5. A copyright license for the presentation is not indicated (e.g., in the description or in the presentation slides).
  6. No link is provided back to the book chapter.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 01:19, 26 November 2015 (UTC)Reply

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