Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2014/Parenting styles and adolescent emotion

Feedback edit

Hi, really interesting topic I enjoyed the read! I like have you included a diverse range of theories in your topic.. My only suggestion really would be to go into more depth into some other areas such as how drug use can influence the parenting style or the adolescent? As well as a visual displays! But overall great work!--U3069714 (discusscontribs) 07:23, 26 October 2014 (UTC)Reply

Heading casing edit

 
FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 03:17, 27 October 2014 (UTC)Reply

Editing tip - Linking to Wikipedia articles edit

 
Thank-you for your contributions to Wikiversity! I hope you don't mind being offered a Wikiversity editing tip. Links to Wikipedia article should be made as internal rather than external links. For example, [[w:Pet|pet]] creates a link like this: pet to the Wikipedia pet article. This is preferred to an external link like this https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pet or pet.

I hope this helps to further empower your Wikiversity contributions! -- Jtneill - Talk - c 03:17, 27 October 2014 (UTC)Reply


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener. If you wish to dispute the marks, see the suggested marking dispute process.

 

Overall edit

This presentation is well structured, and informative. Much of the information is taken directly from the book chapter. Remember that the purpose of this task is to provide an overview of the book chapter, with viewers having the option to view the book chapter for more in-depth information.

As the presentation exceeds the time limit, only the first 5 minutes have been taken into consideration when marking.

Structure and content edit

The structure is clear, and the flow between ideas if logical. Theory and research are both a primary focus, giving the presentation a sound academic quality. No illustrative examples are used.

Communication edit

The voice-over uses appropriate expression. It is slightly too fast in areas. The flow is interrupted at the beginning of most slides with 'filler' words (e.g. "um" or "ok"). The slides generally contain too much information. Remember to choose only the most important points to re-enforce. It is best not to read directly from slides.

Production quality edit

The presentation exceeds the 5 minute time limit. Basic production tools are used effectively. The audio quality is quite good. The visuals are clear. A link to the book chapter is provided. Copyright license information is provided.

ShaunaB (discusscontribs) 03:38, 19 November 2014 (UTC)Reply


Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

 

Overall edit

  1. Overall, this is a basic chapter which could be improved by focusing less on the separate constructs (parenting styles and emotion) and more on their inter-relation. The quality of written expression. For more feedback, see my copyedits and comments below.

Theory edit

  1. Theory about the separate constructs (parenting styles, emotion, adolescence) should be summarised and more emphasis should be placed on explaining how and why parenting styles may affect short- and longer-term emotional experience.

Research edit

  1. The most useful/relevant research is described towards the end of the chapter; ideally this material would be incorporated earlier and expanded.
  2. When describing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
  3. Some statements were unreferenced - see the [factual?] tags

Written expression edit

  1. The quality of written expression could be improved where clarification templates have been added to the page.
  2. Layout
    1. Several edits were made to correct/simplify the layout; more could be done e.g. remove the "big" tags from headings and remove the roundboxes (to aid with accessibility/readability)
    2. Put external links into an external links section at the end
    3. See earlier comments about heading casing
    4. Tables and/or Figures should be used to help illustrate key points.
  3. Learning features
    1. Some links to Wikipedia and/or Wikiversity articles were added as external links - these should be changed to interwiki links
    2. One or more case studies could be helpful.
  4. Spelling, grammar and proofreading could be improved.
    1. The grammar for some sentences could be improved - see the [grammar?] tags
    2. Spelling could be improved - see the [spelling?] tags
    3. Use Australian spelling e.g., hypothesize -> hypothesise
    4. Check use of ownership apostrophes e.g., individuals vs. individual's vs. individuals'
    5. Use abbreviations such as "e.g." inside brackets and "for example" outside brackets
  5. APA style for the references could be improved by applying italics, correcting capitalisation, and removing issue numbers for seriated journals.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 00:52, 27 November 2014 (UTC)Reply

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