Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2014/Cosmetic surgery motivation

Im currently drafting my chapter - this isn't the completed product (in terms of formatting and set up) u3014122

Some ideas

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Make your Chapter preface and Personal motivations sections into a case study.

Remember that only the first word in titles should be capitalised.

Limit subjective opinions such as 'looking at me, you would not know that I have had any work done'.

The last paragraph of the Personal motivations section could create a good base for the Overview section. N8. (discusscontribs) 02:18, 26 October 2014 (UTC)Reply

Theories

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Hey! This is really interesting, I've always wondered what motivates someone to get cosmetic surgery. Just remember to link it back to theories we have discussed throughout the semester. The marking criteria on the unit outline states: "Theory (30%): Identify, understand, and make effective use of key motivation and/or emotion theoretical concepts in exploring the topic. Demonstrate critical thinking and application of the theor(ies)." Considering how heavily weighted the theoretical side is, make sure you include this. Have a flick through the text book for ideas, it's so helpful! Good luck with the rest :) --121.223.187.104 (discuss) 10:17, 26 October 2014 (UTC)Reply

Heading casing

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FYI, the convention on Wikiversity is for lower-cased headings. For example, use:

==Cats and dogs==

rather than

==Cats and Dogs==

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 11:04, 26 October 2014 (UTC)Reply

Target audience

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Note that the target audience is a layperson interested in improving something about themselves from psychological science (i.e., the target audience is broader than psychology students). -- Jtneill - Talk - c 11:07, 26 October 2014 (UTC)Reply

Image captions

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I recommend providing APA style captions for images. -- Jtneill - Talk - c 13:32, 27 October 2014 (UTC)Reply

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener. If you wish to dispute the marks, see the suggested marking dispute process.

 

Overall

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  1. Overall, this presentation has excellent content - the depth of knowledge is very impressive. The presentation could be improved by providing narration.
  1. An extremely well designed and organised presentation which gives an overview of the motivations behind cosmetic surgery and the contribution of motivation and emotion theory and research in the area. The presentation displayed logical progression between concepts and particularly impressive integration of theory and research throughout. Overall a very interesting presentation to watch with a comprehensive overview of related statistics and the history of plastic surgery.
  1. The presentation and communication of content and ideas is clear and engaging and displayed good use of illustrative examples. The presentation could be improved however by using a voice over (communication of ideas using voice) rather than background music and perhaps slowing the pace of slides. Check spelling and grammar (several errors).
  1. The presentation had clear picture and sound quality and demonstrated effective use of a production tool (PowToon) to communicate ideas. Copyright license is indicated on the second slide but inconsistent with the standard youtube license. A link is provided to the book chapter on the second slide but should also be provided in the video description so that there is a clickable hyperlink. A link is provided from the book chapter to the presentation.

RenaeLN (discusscontribs) 01:47, 21 November 2014 (UTC)Reply


Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

 

Overall

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  1. Overall, this is a very good chapter.
  2. For more feedback, see these copyedits and comments below.
  1. Theory is well covered, with helpful, interesting examples.
  1. Research is well covered, with relevant, useful studies.
  1. Written expression
    1. The chapter is over the 4,000 word maximum.
    2. Avoid one sentence paragraphs. A paragraph should typically consist of three to five sentences.
    3. Useful case study.
  2. Layout
    1. Figures and boxes were used effectively.
  3. Learning features
    1. The chapter makes some good use of interwiki links.
  4. Grammar and proofreading
    1. The grammar of some sentences need to be improved (e.g., see the [grammar?] tags)
    2. Check and correct the use of ownership apostrophes (e.g., individuals vs. individual's vs. individuals')
    3. Check and correct use of commas - some are missing and some aren't needed.
    4. e.g, -> e.g.,
  5. APA style
    1. Check and correct APA style of table and figure captions.
    2. Use ampersand (&) inside brackets and "and" outside brackets.
    3. Check/correct APA style for in-text citations
    4. Direct quotes need page numbers.
    5. The reference list is not in full APA style.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 01:46, 8 December 2014 (UTC)Reply

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