Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2013/Mindfulness

Comments

Hey Vin, Don't forget to add all your references in the reference list as I noted a large number that you cite were not listed in your reference list, cheers gail.--Gailstopp (discuss • contribs) 23:13, 2 November 2013 (UTC) Oops Vin hey, I forgot to mention there is a great article titled Mindfulness decouples the relation between automatic alcohol motivation and heavy drinking by Ostafin, B. D., Bauer, C. & Myxter, P. that came out in the journal of Social and Clinical Psychology Vol 31, 2012 (pp. 729-745). I'm happy to try to write a bit for your article of you wish - I just didn't want to jump right in straight away and change your work? Give me a call if you want to add a paragraph or something came across during my researching  :-) g.--Gailstopp (discuss • contribs) 07:20, 31 October 2013 (UTC) --Gailstopp (discuss • contribs) 07:20, 31 October 2013 (UTC)

Hey Vin, I think a few explanations might be handy - such as in para 6: 'body scan,... sitting and walking meditation'? Paragraph 8: valence and desirability of the experience - 'valence' is that spelling correct - what does it mean - do you mean the skirt around a bed? Para 8: explain what a 'decentered' again correct spelling? What is a decentered relationship? Lastly in Para 8 explain what base line is - we psychology students know however, Joe Citizen might not.

I'd suggest that you give Headings to the three paragraphs under IAA Mechanisms of mindfulness: Para 11 Intention. and flesh out what is meant by practicing in the first place? - if you can add a space before 'you would' after the comma following 'all'. It might also assist the lay reader to understand what 'self-liberation moved towards self-liberation and compassion service' mean in context in that paragraph. Para 12 could naturally be headed Attention. And ideally you should explain what Gestalt therapy means - perhaps with an example? And also explain why it is 'curative'? Para 13 Could naturally be headed Attitudinal, and also explain what 'with bare awareness' means to a lay person? In addition to 'attention explicit' and 'may I infuse my awareness with compassion, etc' what do you mean by this statement - is it a mantra perhaps? And 'practice that is condemning or judgmental of inner experience' I'm not sure what this might mean to a lay reader like myself even? Para 14 'disidentify' spelling and meaning? and further in the same para 'reperceiving' spelling and meaning with examples? "meta-mechanism of action, which overreaches additional direct mechanisms" ?? and check spacing after the commas in that para. Also give an example of a 'linear pathway'. Para 15 watch the spacing and explain what 'less awake states of habitual or automatic functioning' can mean to people/individuals? Para 16 ultimate paragraph 'reperceiving', 'dysregulation', 'habitual reactive patterns', means in the context of mindfulness and remember to check spelling my friend. I hope I'm not offending you with all these comments Vin, I just feel it can be tweaked a bit here and there and it will be improved.--Gailstopp (discuss • contribs) 07:11, 31 October 2013 (UTC)

Hi Vin, Your book chapter is looking very good! I'm going overseas in January to study Positive Psychology so it was very interesting reading your chapter! I suggest maybe you add some pictures or a quiz or something just to break up all the writing! Smith6 (discuss • contribs) 23:49, 25 October 2013 (UTC)

Self Determination Theory

Hey Vin! Was just doing some research for my own chapter and found this article which might be useful for you; it has a little bit about mindfulness in it. Hopefully I entered the link properly but if not, here's the citation to look it up!

Deci, E. L., & Ryan, R. M. (2008). Self-determination theory: A macrotheory of human motivation, development, and health. Canadian Psychology, 49, 182-185.

Kellieadellie (discuss • contribs) 10:47, 28 August 2013 (UTC)

Hey Vin, i was thinking it may be useful to have a section on 'learning mindfulness' and how people can learn this approach in themselves. It got me thinking how some people claim they just 'cant learn relaxation', i wonder if there is any research out there like this on mindfulness, and how this can be overcome Rashpocket (discuss • contribs) 06:49, 25 September 2013 (UTC)

Hi Vin, Cant believe how many words you have written already. Sounds good thou. I would just recommend that you break the sections up with some sub headings as it is a lot to read in one chunk. Florence21 (discuss • contribs) 00:57, 17 October 2013 (UTC)

Hi Vin, I heard you asking yesterday about how to insert pictures onto your page; I found this which might help! (Unless James has already helped you, in which case disregard :P): Picture Tutorial for Wiki Pages About halfway down the web page is a video tutorial of how to insert and caption pictures. Your page is looking great so far! The only suggestion I could make is to make sure you reference everything (particularly a couple of sentences in the first paragraph). Can't wait to see it when it's done :) Kellieadellie (discuss • contribs)

Wow Vin, great work compadre! Would love to see some headings and images but i'm sure you are getting the text on the page first which is great. Not sure if you can find this guys images on Wiki commons but you might enjoy the artwork of Alex Grey for use in your book chapter. Here's a link: http://alexgrey.com/ Best of luck! Keep it up! PatrickBateman (discuss • contribs) 07:21, 21 October 2013 (UTC)

Heyy Vin, My topic is Acceptance and Commitment therapy and I've found that it is linked to mindfulness, So I'm wondering if you'd mind me referring to your chapter, it Would be a simple foot note giving readers your chapter number if they wanted more info on mindfulness. :) U3065856 (discuss • contribs) 23:52, 22 October 2013 (UTC)

Hey Vin, saw a cool photo featured on "photo of the day" on wiki, thought you might like it

Tian Tan Buddha by Beria

goodluck Rashpocket (discuss • contribs) 23:36, 23 October 2013 (UTC)

Wow so much info! My chapter on yoga and emotion is strongly linked to mindfulness so feel free to have a look at it for some more diverse info, perhaps you could use yoga as an example way to increase mindfulness for your readers? Also here is a very interesting article I found on mindfulness! It might be useful for you too :) Brown, K. W., & Ryan, R. M. (2003). The Benefits of Being Present: Mindfulness and Its Role in Psychological Well-Being. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 84(4), 822-848. Iluvyoga4lyf3 (discuss • contribs) 23:36, 29 October 2013 (UTC)

Heading casing

Note that the Wikiversity convention is for lower-case headings. -- Jtneill - Talk - c 12:19, 24 September 2013 (UTC)

Reminder to login

Note that many of the recent edits to this page have been from an IP address. Remember to login before editing. Sincerely, James -- Jtneill - Talk - c 22:56, 24 September 2013 (UTC)

Paragraph length tip

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 14:09, 26 September 2013 (UTC)

Mindfulness & MotivationVin Raturi (discuss • contribs) 03:54, 22 August 2013 (UTC)

Some interesting reads

Hey Vin, I see you have already done a lot of your page but I did a unit on mindfulness at another uni and have a stack of good info so I thought i'd send you a couple of things that might be useful. Such a good topic. I read your page and its sounding really good! --Leisamce (discuss • contribs) 01:08, 22 October 2013 (UTC)

None None

Feedback

Hey Vin, looks like you have a lot of information there! Is there any way you could perhaps make some smaller headings that fit under the main ones? just so that when a reader reads it they aren't overwhelmed with the amount of information presented, this also makes it seems less chunky and easier to go through. Even just putting in some more spaces between paragraphs might help. Also, I think including some visual aids will really help the page pop! Great work so far! DorisWeasley (discuss • contribs) 03:00, 2 November 2013 (UTC)

More feedback

Looks like everyone is pitching in to help make this an interesting and useful book to read, well done guys! Vin, like everyone else my main suggestion is to break up your text by placing images or tables into your chapter. Try using the wiki commons https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Category:Images to find some free to use images. If you don't know how to insert them just take a look at someones chapter in the 'edit' mode to get the code.
One other thing I would suggest (you don't have to take on board if you don't want to) is providing links to Mindfulness courses available around Canberra or Australia eg.Simply Mindful this will allow users to take on board your take of mindfulness and take the next step if the wanted.
Otherwise you have provided alot of interesting information on the topic in an easy to read format, well done! --Kstan (discuss • contribs) 04:21, 2 November 2013 (UTC)

Some more feedback

Hi Vin,

Looking good! You've certainly got some good points in there! I agree with the other feedback and think and adding some images and a bit of colour might help it stand out a bit more as right now it looks a little dry.

Also, there is a lot of information online about mindfulness and it might be worth doing a quick google search and looking at some of the links out there to add to a "see also" or "external links" section.

Best of luck!

Amyr16 (discuss • contribs) 06:13, 2 November 2013 (UTC)

Hi Vin

Just noticed your moodle post and have left the same link there, cutting and pasting directly from the link aided in my image issues! https://en.wikiversity.org/wiki/Help:Images#Images Best Rosey0703 (discuss • contribs):)

Vin your chapter is looking really good, very informative. Like most of the other feedback I think some pictures to give it a little colour is a really good idea.

I know that James has said something, but some of the paragraphs are really long. Most paragraphs in academic writing are only about 5 sentences long. Try going though them and see if you can create two paragraphs rather then leaving them as one or cutting anything out.

Another thing, I know this is meant to be in APA format, but this assignment is a self-help book chapter. It would be ok to use some examples (such as 'imagine you...') to help readers better understand what you are talking about. At the moment the chapter reads more like an essay. Other than those things really good work. Caitlin Malicki (discuss • contribs) 13:51, 2 November 2013 (UTC)User:Caitlin_Malicki

Hi Vin, Great work with your book chapter. You have alot of good information, I did however find it difficult to read as it did seem to drag on bait.. Alot of what i have noticed does appear to already have been said in early comments, such as the lack of pics, lack of examples. I did notice that you haven't added any type of exercises or activities or quizzes to engage your reader. Maybe this could be something to look into. Fantastic work tho. Tovey ally (discuss • contribs) 00:51, 3 November 2013 (UTC)

Hi Vin, your chapter looks great, looks lil you have put heaps of time into it! you might want to just add a proper title to it, as people may forget quit quickly what it is exactly that you are writing about. you could do this by easily going:

Mindfulness - What is it and how can it be developed?

This page is part of the Motivation and emotion book. See also: Guidelines.

Completion status: this resource is considered to be complete.

Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

Overall This is a well presented and constructed chapter - well done! Theory Theory is a particular strength of this chapter, with the constructs presented being described clearly and thoroughly. A greater focus on practical application would benefit the chapter. Research Research is integrated nicely throughout. The studies presented are explained in a manner that is appropriate for the target audience. To improve further, include some evidence of critical thinking. Written expression This chapter is nicely structured and written expression is mainly clear. APA is well done. The topic really lends itself to practical application and the inclusion of a quiz or 'try it yourself' exercise would greatly benefit the chapter. ShaunaB (discuss • contribs)

pretty basic, but hope it helps! Imogens13 (discuss • contribs) 07:40, 3 November 2013 (UTC)

Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via login to the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener. If you wish to dispute the marks, see the suggested marking dispute process.

Overall Overall, this is well presented, but may be a little 'content heavy' for a summary. Structure and content Theory and resaerch are well integrated throughout. Remember that the task is to create a summary of the chapter, not a narrative of it. The presentation is a little content heavy in areas. The flow is good throughout the body section, however a clear introduction and conclusion would have been beneficial. Communication Ideas are communicated clearly through voice and image. I would suggest that the slides contained too much information - I found myself reading the content, rather than listening to the presentation. The inclusion of illustrative examples would also be useful. Production quality Picture and sound quality are both adequate. Basic production tools have been used well. The presentation appears to be well prepared and comes across as professinal. ShaunaB (discuss • contribs)