Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2010/Learned helplessness


Chapter feedback

This textbook chapter has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via login to the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to see what editing changes I have made whilst reading through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below or continuing to improve the chapter if you wish. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener. If you wish to dispute the marks, see the suggested marking dispute process.

 

Overall

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  1. Overall, this is a solid CR-level textbook chapter. The coverage of theory and research was DI-level and the quality of written expression was P-level.
  1. Very good coverage of theoretical development of learned helplessness.
  1. Very good inclusion of relevant research, with excellent description of research methods and discussion of results.
  1. Overall, the quality of written expression was sufficient, but could have done with another draft and proofread. In addition, there was minimal use of the wiki format towards providing extra learning features.
  2. Written expression
    1. Use gender neutral language e.g., man -> human
    2. Avoid colloquialism e.g., "came off the back of"
    3. The chapter could have benefited from developing clear focus questions. Getting comments on a chapter plan and/or chapter draft could have helped with this aspect.
  3. Learning features
    1. Limited use of images.
    2. There were no wiki-links.
    3. Image captions - could be related more clearly to the chapter text e.g., "Wolves are the best kinds of dogs." ?
  4. Spelling, grammar and proofreading
    1. Use Australian spelling e.g., hypothesize -> hypothesise
    2. Check grammar e.g., this is not a complete sentence "Citing that learned helplessness results from receiving aversive stimuli in a situation in which any contingent responses or attempts to respond occur in the presence of the aversive stimuli, and where such responses hold no significance to eliminating or reducing the severity of the traumatic stimulus.", nor is "Such that, despite the severity of the individual’s condition, it was the belief in their ability to control or cope with their disease that determined their level of depression, rather than the reality of their subjective condition (Smith, Peck, & Ward, 1990)."
    3. Semi-colons were used unnecessarily
    4. Check use of ownership apostrophes e.g., individuals -> individual's
  5. APA style
    1. Do not cite the year for subsequent citations within a paragraph e.g., Smith (2010) but after that in the same paragraph only refer to Smith.
    2. When there are three or more authors, subsequent citations should use et al. e.g., Smith, Bush and Western (2001) and then in the next paragraph cite Smith et al. (2001).
    3. Use ampersand (&) inside brackets and "and" outside brackets.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 10:31, 11 December 2010 (UTC)Reply


Multimedia presentation feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's UCLearn site. Written feedback is provided below, plus see the general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener.

 

Overall

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  1. At the beginning, discuss - what is the topic? Why is it important? What will I learn by watching this?
  2. Good variation in voice tone (helps to maintain viewer interest). I found it easy to follow your voice as it lead through the content.
  3. Very effective use of images
  4. Well selected content (focused in on conveying key points well, rather than everything quickly)
  5. Simple, clear slides. Animation of bullet-points can help to focus viewer attention on each.
  6. Effective use of examples for explanatory style
  7. No summary of conclusion?
  8. Image attributions?
  9. Copyright license for the presentation?

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 10:15, 14 December 2010 (UTC)Reply

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