Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2014/Amotivation

Headings

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Your page is a bit hard to follow, I think the issue is that you have used three equals signs (which makes sub headings) instead of using 2 equal signs. When using subheadings use 3 but when you are creating titles use the following == insert text here == Good luck with the rest of your chapter AGH BMW (discusscontribs) 04:14, 23 October 2014 (UTC)Reply


Australian spelling

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Hi! I know it's still very early days, but while trying to figure out how I could help your page (which i'm really liking the layout of, by the way) I noticed you had used words such as utilize and desensitize, rather than the Australian counterparts with the S instead. I know it's a very pedantic thing to pick out but it's explicitly mentioned in the assessment criteria to use Australia spelling and it would suck to lose marks for something so trivial.

Joelthebaws (discusscontribs)

Headings

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Your page is a bit hard to follow, I think the issue is that you have used three equals signs (which makes sub headings) instead of using 2 equal signs. When using subheadings use 3 but when you are creating titles use the following == insert text here ==


Comments

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Hi, I love this chapter, it's going to be a fantastic read when it is finished, and well done on getting this much done :). I changed a little spelling error around. I really am looking forward to what will come under the headings 'finding motivation' and 'preventing amotivation' they sound very interesting. Perhaps even something interactive there? Well done.

--Lucy90 (discusscontribs) 23:32, 4 October 2014 (UTC)Reply

Comment

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Hi, I just was wondering whether you should consider throwing some more in-text citations into your chapter. I notice a fair few sentences filled with 'factual information' which you've gained from somewhere, that should be referenced within the text as well as in your reference list. Nice job on your chapter & all the best. U3083503 (discusscontribs) 12:45, 22 October 2014 (UTC)Reply

APA style captions for images and tables

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I recommend using APA style captions i.e., Figure 1, Figure 2 etc. for all images, graphs etc. and Table 1, Table 2 etc. for all tables. The caption text should not be in italics. For more detail and examples, see http://libguides.newcastle.edu.au/content.php?pid=113807&sid=1208571 -- Jtneill - Talk - c 10:00, 23 October 2014 (UTC)Reply

comment

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hi, i thought it might look nicer if you made the spaces between paragraphs smaller and also not have a space between the heading and the first paragraph. also in the overview i thought it might be better if you had intrinsic motivation is: on a separate line and on the same line as the definition provided, also intrinsic motivation definition can probably be in the same para as the other definitions. --Hynes08 (discusscontribs) 00:34, 24 October 2014 (UTC)Reply

General layout Stuff

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Hey, just had a quick read through and couldn't find anything to edit for the content so i thought i'd suggest a bit for the layout of the page. I've noticed that you're using breaks between the titles and the contents below. I'd suggest that you change the breaks so that they happen after each section rather than at the start of it. This will just show how the title is connected to the content coming after it more than the stuff before it (not completely necessary, it'll just make it flow better and look nicer). The second thing i'd suggest is that you either remove one or more of the images in the first section, and add (or spread the current ones out) some to the subsequent sections. It just looks a bit top heavy. ZombrexJim (discusscontribs) 23:09, 26 October 2014 (UTC)Reply


Multimedia feedback

The accompanying multimedia presentation has been marked according to the marking criteria. Marks are available via the unit's Moodle site. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below. If you would like further clarification about the marking or feedback, contact the unit convener. If you wish to dispute the marks, see the suggested marking dispute process.

 

Overall

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Overall, a basic but informative presentation.

The structure is good, and the flow seems logical. Theory and research are touched on, but could have been explored more directly in areas. The practical tips towards the end are great, and could have been focused on for slightly longer. Overview and concluding slides are also good. Including an introduction, to introduce the presentation more broadly, at the beginning would be useful.

The voice-over is well paced, with reasonable pauses between sentences and slides. More expression could have been used to make it more engaging. The slides are very basic, and could be improved by using more (more changes between slides would make it more engaging) and including slightly more information on each slide. Images can also facilitate greater engagement with the content.

Basic production tools are used to sufficient level. The quality of visuals and audio are both good. A link to the book chapter is provided. No copyright license information is provided.

ShaunaB - Talk


Chapter review and feedback

This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Chapter marks will be available later via Moodle, along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements.

 

Overall

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  1. Overall, this chapter provides a reasonable overview of amotivation. For more feedback, see my copyedits and comments below.
  1. More could probably be covered about Deci and Ryan's model and the suggested steps from extrinsic to intrinsic motivation.
  1. Some research studies are described, but there are also significant sections which do not seem to draw on peer-reviewed research.
  2. When describing important research findings, indicate the size of effects in addition to whether or not there was an effect or relationship.
  3. Some statements were unreferenced - e.g., see the [factual?] tags
  1. Written expression
    1. Earlier feedback doesn't appear to have been acted on.
    2. The quality of written expression could be improved where clarification templates have been added to the page.
    3. The chapter could be improved by expanding the Conclusion.
  2. Layout
    1. Remove <br /> syntax
    2. Check and correct the heading levels
    3. A few Figures were used; more could be added.
  3. Learning features
    1. The text could become more interactive by including interwiki links.
  4. Spelling, grammar and proofreading
    1. Use Australian spelling e.g., hypothesize -> hypothesise
    2. The grammar for some sentences could be improved - see the [grammar?] tags
    3. Check and correct the use of ownership apostrophes e.g., individuals vs. individual's vs. individuals'
  5. APA style
    1. Direct quotes need page numbers. They should also be integrated into sentences and paragraphs, rather than being presented on their own.
    2. Check and correct APA style for in-text citations
    3. The reference list was not in full APA style.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 12:46, 27 November 2014 (UTC)Reply

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